For those of you thinking, hey, I'm going to steal from one of the most badass athletes on the planet, Serena Williams has parable for you. Once upon a time, a tennis player–one of the greatest of all time–is at dinner. She notices some guy standing by her table grab her phone and take off. You can read the whole story below, which Williams posted on her Facebook. And keep in mind this is coming from a person who can hit a tennis ball 118 MPH.
Soooooo yesterday at dinner the CRAZIEST THING happened to me. I was sitting enjoying some Chinese food (delicious may I add) and this guy stands next to me. It was only 2 of us sitting at a 4 person table just chatting like we have not seen each other in years. Anyways I digress, so this guy is standing next to me and something (I have now dubbed it my SUPERHERO sense) told me to watch him. My phone was sitting in the chair but I just didn't feel right. He was there too long. "Is he a customer?" I thought "Is he waiting on the bathroom?" nonetheless I tried to shake his this eerie feeling. However, I kept watching him from the corner of my eye. Than when least expected low and behold this common petty thief grabbed my phone and swiftly left. I looked at the chair, than shouted "Omg that dude took my phone!!" Not thinking I reacted (hence the superwoman photo) I jumped up, weaved my way in and out of the cozy restaurant (leaping over a chair or two) and chased him down.He began to run but I was too fast. (Those sprints came in handy) I was upon him in a flash!
In the most menacing yet calm no nonsense voice I could muster I kindly asked him if he "accidentally" took the wrong phone. He stumbled on his words probably not expecting this to happen. While he was thinking of the right thing to say and eventually he said "Gosh you know what I did! It was so confusing in there. I must have grabbed the wrong phone."
Meanwhile My phone was ringing, my superhero sidekick quailman was face timing me so he could not possibly deny the allegations. I swiftly thanked him and left.
[h/t: Deadspin]
