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Next Part of Michelle's Meteor Memento now on!

03 Mar 2012 21:11 #26417 by njae
It took longer than expected, but Part 5 is finally done and ready for you to read. Naturally I'd like to hear everyone's opinion about it.
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04 Mar 2012 09:12 #26419 by inactive
I thought is was a good continuation of the saga. There's a continuing undercurrent of hints that Michelle's superpowers may not be the free lunch that she might wish. I'm interested to see how Michelle and Amanda take different approaches to their transformations. I hope Amanda doesn't get hoodwinked by that jerk Fred again.

Good stuff. Thank you.

- GeekSeven
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04 Mar 2012 17:32 #26423 by njae

There's a continuing undercurrent of hints that Michelle's superpowers may not be the free lunch that she might wish. I'm interested to see how Michelle and Amanda take different approaches to their transformations.


There is a catch, of course. How much of a bad thing this is depends on who you ask.

I hope Amanda doesn't get hoodwinked by that jerk Fred again.


Amanda knows that Fred hides something and she wants to find out what that is. Right now she has the advantage that Fred considers her two different people. Who can blame her for not trusting him enough to tell him that she is 'Devil'.

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04 Mar 2012 19:19 #26425 by The Highlander
Replied by The Highlander on topic Re: Next Part of Michelle's Meteor Memento now on!
Another excellent chapter, I do like the fact that all the characters so far are fairly ‘realistic’. In particular Fred, for all his faults, doesn’t seem like the sort of abusive thug that feature in far too many of this sort of story. There’s also the gradual suspense building in the background with James’ investigation, and the possibility that the kidnapping at the end was some sort of setup.

Keep up the good work!
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04 Mar 2012 23:03 #26427 by njae

The Highlander wrote: ...and the possibility that the kidnapping at the end was some sort of setup.


How did you come to that conclusion?

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05 Mar 2012 23:13 #26441 by The Highlander
Replied by The Highlander on topic Re: Next Part of Michelle's Meteor Memento now on!
The refinance to wires and security cameras in the last sentence (although judging from your reaction I’m just being paranoid).

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05 Mar 2012 23:38 #26442 by njae
I only intended it to be normal security cameras so that her actions won't stay on rumor-level for much longer. Then again I changes my plans before, so who knows... :P

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06 Mar 2012 07:21 #26443 by jumperprime
Replied by jumperprime on topic Re: Next Part of Michelle's Meteor Memento now on!
I'm more interested in the possibility of more superwomen besides Michelle and Amanda. The drug addict who died of an overdose of her drug of choice, a dose that shouldn't have been enough to kill someone with her history, and now we find out that she had a buncha extra chromosomes and she looked way better than she should've. Sounds to me like there's another source of super juice out there. Maybe someone else found some seeds as well, planted them, got some juice from the plant, and the drug addict got some, then after changing back took a hit of her usual dosage not realizing that it would kill her.
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06 Mar 2012 13:27 #26445 by njae

Maybe someone else found some seeds as well, planted them, got some juice from the plant, and the drug addict got some, then after changing back took a hit of her usual dosage not realizing that it would kill her.


It's a bit more complicated, but close enough ;) I already know how this particular plotline ends, but it will take a while to get there.

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07 Mar 2012 00:33 #26448 by JKIJ
I liked the new chapter every bit as much as the previous ones. I find it interesting that when someone takes the super-potion they get an extra bunch of chromosomes. That will probably make it more difficult for Michelle and Amanda to maintain a secret identity. I wonder what effect the extra bits of DNA will have on their ability to have children and any children they do have.

I look forward to more.
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07 Mar 2012 01:13 #26449 by njae

JKIJ wrote: I liked the new chapter every bit as much as the previous ones. I find it interesting that when someone takes the super-potion they get an extra bunch of chromosomes. That will probably make it more difficult for Michelle and Amanda to maintain a secret identity. I wonder what effect the extra bits of DNA will have on their ability to have children and any children they do have.

I look forward to more.


They won't be happy to learn that they can't have children with normal men. Luckily neither of them wants to become a mother asap.

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08 Mar 2012 13:50 #26466 by ong76win2
Wow! Great update! Hope to read more of this series. Thanks for sharing.
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10 Mar 2012 22:43 #26496 by njae
Thanks for all this feedback everyone. This really helped to get me motivated.

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30 Mar 2012 08:43 #26818 by argonaut
I enjoyed this chapter as much as the earlier ones, and like the earlier ones it leaves me curious to know where you're heading with your various plots.

The dead drug addict raises a question I asked in connection with a previous chapter -- namely, whether the plant is sentient and has some purpose in conferring super-powers on Michelle and others. Hopefully time will tell. I'm a little surprised that Michelle hasn't looked for more of the plants at the meteor site.

I like the fact that the girls' super-powers don't come with an instruction manual. It's been interesting to see them experiment with their powers, discover new ones, and make mistakes using them. That's a big part of your story's appeal.

It looks as if the existence of one or more super-women will soon be public knowledge. I wonder if James will start to connect the dots. (I hope we see him in the next chapter.) And there are hints that Fred may have a secret or two of his own, or am I reading too much into the scene in his hospital room? So many questions!

This story continues to be a fun ride. Looking forward to Chapter 6!
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31 Mar 2012 05:30 #26830 by njae

argonaut wrote: The dead drug addict raises a question I asked in connection with a previous chapter -- namely, whether the plant is sentient and has some purpose in conferring super-powers on Michelle and others. Hopefully time will tell. I'm a little surprised that Michelle hasn't looked for more of the plants at the meteor site.


Interesting. Didn't expect that the dead drug addict might raise this particular question. As for Michelle not searching the meteor site, it's been thoroughly searched and if there was a seed it's somewhere in a lab right now... Michelle herself found her seed somewhere on a sidewalk, so she can only guess that it's related to the meteor.

argonaut wrote: I like the fact that the girls' super-powers don't come with an instruction manual. It's been interesting to see them experiment with their powers, discover new ones, and make mistakes using them. That's a big part of your story's appeal.


Thanks, I'm trying to walk the thin line between instinctively knowing how to use their powers and having no actual experience with them. Speaking of experimentation: Did anybody figure out what Michelle's 'Plan B' was?

argonaut wrote: It looks as if the existence of one or more super-women will soon be public knowledge. I wonder if James will start to connect the dots. (I hope we see him in the next chapter.) And there are hints that Fred may have a secret or two of his own, or am I reading too much into the scene in his hospital room? So many questions!


Of course James will appear in the next chapter. And no, you're not reading too much into the scene in the hospital room - Amanda became aware of that as well. I can only say stay tuned!

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31 Mar 2012 06:12 #26831 by Caylane
We can only hope the next chapter will be finished soon! I haven't had this much fun reading a series since the Serena stories.
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31 Mar 2012 21:32 #26834 by njae

Caylane wrote: We can only hope the next chapter will be finished soon! I haven't had this much fun reading a series since the Serena stories.


You're praising me way too much here. :blush:

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01 Apr 2012 00:03 #26837 by fats

njae wrote:

Caylane wrote: We can only hope the next chapter will be finished soon! I haven't had this much fun reading a series since the Serena stories.


You're praising me way too much here. :blush:


writers can never be praised enough!!!

fats

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01 Apr 2012 03:33 #26842 by oldHarmonyMotion
Replied by oldHarmonyMotion on topic Re: Next Part of Michelle's Meteor Memento now on!
What fats said!

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13 Aug 2012 19:11 #28147 by njae
Opening a new thread for each new instalment gets a bit boring, so I think it's better to continue using this one.

Anyway Part 7 is now in the banks and as always I'd like to hear your opinion since that's where my motivation comes from.

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14 Aug 2012 04:34 #28152 by Jabbrwock
Replied by Jabbrwock on topic Next Part of Michelle's Meteor Memento now on!

njae wrote: Opening a new thread for each new instalment gets a bit boring, so I think it's better to continue using this one.

Anyway Part 7 is now in the banks and as always I'd like to hear your opinion since that's where my motivation comes from.


Excellent news! Thanks again and always for this awesome story.
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15 Aug 2012 01:44 #28157 by oldHarmonyMotion
Replied by oldHarmonyMotion on topic Next Part of Michelle's Meteor Memento now on!
whoa, didn't know you decided to publish

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15 Aug 2012 05:19 #28158 by njae

goobers wrote: whoa, didn't know you decided to publish


I mentioned it several times in the chat before I published it ;)

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15 Aug 2012 06:37 #28159 by oldHarmonyMotion
Replied by oldHarmonyMotion on topic Next Part of Michelle's Meteor Memento now on!
Am I expected to read what you say in the chat room? Sheesh...

(maybe this is why nobody comes)

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19 Aug 2012 11:07 #28187 by JKIJ
Another fun addition to the growing saga. Some new mysteries and coincidences with new powers beginning to turn up. And a sweet first date two, with both Michelle and James testing each other.

I will be interested to see where the autopsy on the prostitute goes and what it is about Professor Harland's methods that James dislikes.

Bring on part 8 whenever it's ready.

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