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Not the One: Susan's army

15 Dec 2017 03:03 #57731 by Dru1076
Not the One: Susan's army was created by Dru1076
With the return of Conceptfan and a number of stories in progress I think it's time to start work on the final installment of my trillogy Not the One.

Susan is going to be creating a larger army this season, and here's a few of my inspirations

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15 Dec 2017 11:22 #57734 by TheOne25
Replied by TheOne25 on topic Not the One: Susan's army
YEEESSSS! I can't wait to read it Dru! I'm a huge fan of 'Not the One'. One of the first stories I read back on Diana the Valkyrie
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15 Dec 2017 11:58 #57735 by conceptfan
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Brilliant news. Looking forward to this big time!
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15 Dec 2017 14:21 #57736 by Woodclaw
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We'll be waiting for it.
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15 Dec 2017 22:56 #57740 by SCOTT R
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LOVE IT!!!
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15 Dec 2017 23:30 #57741 by Monty
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SCOTT R wrote: LOVE IT!!!


Here's the link to Dru's great work on Not the One.

www.thevalkyrie.com/stories/dru/index.htm
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18 Dec 2017 22:56 - 18 Dec 2017 23:02 #57764 by Dru1076
Replied by Dru1076 on topic Not the One: Susan's army

Woodclaw wrote: We'll be waiting for it.


Well...good things come to those who wait.

In the meantime...here are a few more of my inspirations to consider.

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Last edit: 18 Dec 2017 23:02 by Dru1076.
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23 Dec 2017 13:34 #57830 by Dru1076
Replied by Dru1076 on topic Not the One: Susan's army
I didn't think I'd have anything before the new year...but I don't mind being wrong sometimes. And so...for your reading pleasure...I give you Not the One: Point of Origin Part I. It's on it's way to the SWM bookshelf as we speak, and you can check it out here as well: dru1076.deviantart.com/art/Not-the-One-P...f-Origin-I-721519026
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23 Dec 2017 14:06 #57831 by Woodclaw
Replied by Woodclaw on topic Not the One: Susan's army

Dru1076 wrote: I didn't think I'd have anything before the new year...but I don't mind being wrong sometimes. And so...for your reading pleasure...I give you Not the One: Point of Origin Part I. It's on it's way to the SWM bookshelf as we speak, and you can check it out here as well: dru1076.deviantart.com/art/Not-the-One-P...f-Origin-I-721519026


The story is up. I might edit have to work a few kinks to make it line-up with the previous entries, but it works.
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23 Dec 2017 15:55 #57832 by conceptfan
Replied by conceptfan on topic Not the One: Susan's army
Wow, that's what I call an early Xmas present!

Loving the idea of levels of power upon levels of power and on and on... power to the power of power! Not to mention how the whole idea of a "Unchosen One" appeals to my tastes ;)

That was great fun, Dru... I especially loved
Warning: Spoiler!


Most of all though, you have made me desperate to read the next part! I really hope
Warning: Spoiler!
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25 Dec 2017 06:58 #57844 by SCOTT R
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Awesome story as always Dru! Thanks for the wonderful Xmas present!
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27 Dec 2017 08:25 #57872 by Dru1076
Replied by Dru1076 on topic Not the One: Susan's army

conceptfan wrote: Wow, that's what I call an early Xmas present!

Loving the idea of levels of power upon levels of power and on and on... power to the power of power! Not to mention how the whole idea of a "Unchosen One" appeals to my tastes ;)

That was great fun, Dru... I especially loved

Warning: Spoiler!


Most of all though, you have made me desperate to read the next part! I really hope
Warning: Spoiler!


I am stoked that you enjoyed part I mate. Hope you had a great Christmas!

I'm currently around 2800 words into part II...and want to get around 4000 before I put it up. But it shouldn't take more than a day or two before you all see Tammy in action and get to meet more of Susan's army.

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28 Dec 2017 01:04 #57893 by Dru1076
Replied by Dru1076 on topic Not the One: Susan's army
It might be a bit altered before it pops up here...but here is the draft of Part II. The mayhem begins...

dru1076.deviantart.com/art/Not-the-One-P...in-Part-II-722294695
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29 Dec 2017 02:12 #57908 by steelknight3000
Replied by steelknight3000 on topic Not the One: Susan's army
Just read them, Enjoyed it quite a bit though I don't really care too much for supergirl murder sprees, though I've enjoyed Susan's other adventures and Conceptfan stuff to an extant.

I really liked
-the Japanese woman using her super breath to freeze the room
-Tammy's use of traditional super breath to wipe out the town.
-The girls muscling up as they power up
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29 Dec 2017 06:32 #57912 by Dru1076
Replied by Dru1076 on topic Not the One: Susan's army

steelknight3000 wrote: Just read them, Enjoyed it quite a bit though I don't really care too much for supergirl murder sprees, though I've enjoyed Susan's other adventures and Conceptfan stuff to an extant.

I really liked
-the Japanese woman using her super breath to freeze the room
-Tammy's use of traditional super breath to wipe out the town.
-The girls muscling up as they power up


I am glad you were still able to enjoy the story so far despite the violence. I should warn you, one reason I took to so long to start writing this is because its the darkest part of the story. There will be a lot more before this story is done. But it will, I hope, have enough going on to keep you interested.

The next part will feature the Harem Girls, and very likely a border dispute as people flee before the scarier soldiers Susan empowered (But I'm still working on that). If wont be up as fast pt II, But its in the works...

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01 Jan 2018 11:07 - 01 Jan 2018 11:09 #57951 by lowerbase
Replied by lowerbase on topic Not the One: Susan's army
I'm loving this. For a long time I entertained similar ideas of what would happen to the world if a bunch of women everywhere become awesomely superpowered overnight.

Your story fit this bill perfectly.

On the best girls, it would make them oppressively better to do whatever they think it is good for us. On the worst girls, it would be just damning frightening like being close of an exploding volcano, or a collapsing dam.

It seems that Suzan chose women who had no previous power in society.

Or she superpowered some CEOs, or politicians, celebrities too? Is she giving power to all kinds of women? Helicopter soccermoms, religious zealot women, are on the list?
Last edit: 01 Jan 2018 11:09 by lowerbase.
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01 Jan 2018 12:32 - 01 Jan 2018 12:32 #57952 by AuGoose
Replied by AuGoose on topic Not the One: Susan's army
If the roster's open, I vote internet selfie queen. Someone used to being looked at who has a very refined sense of how to adjust her beauty to her moment-to-moment needs. Might even have some advice for her uber-neighbors. :)

Good fun. A little light dominant violence seems fine in the context that 'the pantheon' has a whole range of personality types.
Last edit: 01 Jan 2018 12:32 by AuGoose.
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01 Jan 2018 17:24 #57956 by ace191
Replied by ace191 on topic Not the One: Susan's army
I do not like some of the senseless violence, but I am willing to tolerate it as I think it will lead into a very interesting plot down the road. Much of the time I can figure out just where a story is going, but I
Really don't have a clue with this one and I always like that. Love the stories that have a turn that you never see coming.
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01 Jan 2018 19:25 #57957 by Pepper
Replied by Pepper on topic Not the One: Susan's army

ace191 wrote: I do not like some of the senseless violence, but I am willing to tolerate it as I think it will lead into a very interesting plot down the road.

I'm kind of the same way. I can understand how someone gaining such extreme abilities might abuse them. That can make for an interesting story. But I've never really understood the characters who take joy in senseless, pure destruction, or the stories that seem to celebrate it.

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01 Jan 2018 22:16 #57958 by ace191
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Amen!

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01 Jan 2018 23:07 #57959 by lowerbase
Replied by lowerbase on topic Not the One: Susan's army

Pepper wrote: I've never really understood the characters who take joy in senseless, pure destruction, or the stories that seem to celebrate it.


Because it is so much fun, Pepper.

This is the best defense I can remember of celebrating violence as entertainment:



No one is obligated to like violent movies, or to like violent games, or violent stories. GTA is a senseless violent game, just as Tarantino movies are. It is just fantasy and if someone doesn't like it, it wasn't made for him.

It is odd this kind of discussion here, it is like being in a Bruce Lee forum questioning why his movies celebrate fighting.
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02 Jan 2018 01:59 #57961 by Dru1076
Replied by Dru1076 on topic Not the One: Susan's army
I am very pleased the story is being enjoyed. I always knew the amount of violence and the nature of several characters would rub a few people the wrong way, so seeing people debate these things is no surprise.

I want to be clear: this story is not Supergirl. It is not a superhero tale by any means. If I had to put it in any one category it would have to be horror.

Last time I got into this kind of discussion was over An Arion Ascends, and in that case I ended up pulling the punch and changing the ending. I regret that, and i'm not going to change course this time.

So fair warning: This story is violent and contains images and ideas some will find disturbing. Read at your own risk!
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02 Jan 2018 02:13 #57962 by Pepper
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lowerbase wrote: No one is obligated to like violent movies, or to like violent games, or violent stories. GTA is a senseless violent game, just as Tarantino movies are. It is just fantasy and if someone doesn't like it, it wasn't made for him.

It is odd this kind of discussion here, it is like being in a Bruce Lee forum questioning why his movies celebrate fighting.

I've seen a few Tarantino films, and even one Bruce Lee, and enjoyed them. But characters in those movies were always fighting for, or against, something. The violence was always in pursuit of some other goal; money, power, revenge, whatever. The idea of destroying a city for no other reason than "because I can" just doesn't make sense to me.

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02 Jan 2018 02:19 #57963 by lowerbase
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Pepper wrote: The idea of destroying a city for no other reason than "because I can" just doesn't make sense to me.


And this is okay.

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02 Jan 2018 02:26 - 02 Jan 2018 02:27 #57964 by Dru1076
Replied by Dru1076 on topic Not the One: Susan's army

Pepper wrote:

lowerbase wrote: No one is obligated to like violent movies, or to like violent games, or violent stories. GTA is a senseless violent game, just as Tarantino movies are. It is just fantasy and if someone doesn't like it, it wasn't made for him.

It is odd this kind of discussion here, it is like being in a Bruce Lee forum questioning why his movies celebrate fighting.

I've seen a few Tarantino films, and even one Bruce Lee, and enjoyed them. But characters in those movies were always fighting for, or against, something. The violence was always in pursuit of some other goal; money, power, revenge, whatever. The idea of destroying a city for no other reason than "because I can" just doesn't make sense to me.


I went to the doctor and said "Doc, it hurts real bad when I do this." And the doctor told me "So don't it.'

I appreciate how you feel about my story. Youre far from the only one who has let me know they despise the senseless violence. If you dont get it, that's fine. Theres more to Not the One than supervillian snuff, but I guess if it hurts you, stop reading it. My goal is not to offend, though I know some will always be offended by my work.
Last edit: 02 Jan 2018 02:27 by Dru1076.
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