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She's not a joke anymore...

28 Sep 2007 13:50 #10399 by Berkhart
She's not a joke anymore... was created by Berkhart
The single craft hovered over Washington D.C. Beneath it humanity waited with both fear and excitement. The combined population of the world watched in anticipation for our visitors to communicate with us. When the alien message finally arrived, the entire planet listened with rapt attention.

“People of this world. We apologize for the fear our presence has likely caused. Rest assured that we mean you know harm, and in fact, come baring a gift. It has been, for countless millennia, our mission to bring worlds such as yours into a new age of peace and prosperity. Unfortunately, the changes needed to bring about this evolution are often resisted by the very people who would benefit most from it.”

While mankind pondered this, the alien message continued.

“As a result, we have chosen a worthy member of your species to lead you to paradise.”

From high above, a single individual emerged from the alien ship, and slowly descended to the surface. In the meantime, the alien speaker continued.

“While we have devised a way of making ourselves understood to you, we have yet to decipher your many languages. Despite this limitation, throughout our missions we have observed many worlds, and come to the following conclusion…”

The figure had floated within a thousand feet of the ground…

“Civilizations tend to celebrate their wisest, brightest, and most gifted members. So, as a result we have examined your planet’s most recent communications to determine who is your most worthy representative. In short order it became clear to us, who this person is…”

People began to pay more attention to the approaching form…

“She absolutely dominated your world’s mass media, and we can only surmise, be superior in every way to her fellow beings. We trust that she will be a worthy god…”

As the figure came ever closer to ground, her features gradually became visible. Blonde hair, tanned skin, black skintight outfit…

“Your new god will be ageless-forever young.

She will be able to move at the speed of light, and as you can see, fly.

Most importantly, this goddess will be both invulnerable and possess incredible strength. So strong, in fact, that the combined power of your planet couldn’t equal a trillionth of a percent of what she could accomplish with a single finger”

Naturally, resisting her enlightened commands will be utterly futile.”


With the pronouncement, the “goddess” gracefully landed on the street, and every man, woman, and child looked upon her with absolute horror.

“Behold you immortal, all powerful god…Britney Spears!”

The blonde woman, dressed in her tight black leather outfit, sneered at the gathered crowds.

As Earth’s eternal nightmare began, the aliens departed, confident the world was in the best of hands. Once the spacecraft was beyond all but Britney’s super vision, she made a fist. Savoring the incredible power surging through her gorgeous body, she let loose a triumphant chuckle.

Then turning her attention to the thousands surrounding her, the troubled, yet unstoppable woman cracked her knuckles, and purred, “Alone at last…”

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28 Sep 2007 16:02 #10405 by Captain Marbles
Replied by Captain Marbles on topic Re: She's not a joke anymore...
This needs "To Be Continued—"

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28 Sep 2007 18:00 #10408 by derekh37
Replied by derekh37 on topic Re: She's not a joke anymore...
with maybe a few lieutenants...
any suggestions?

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28 Sep 2007 19:32 #10410 by Sarge395
Replied by Sarge395 on topic Re: She's not a joke anymore...
Sidekicks could be her wacked out crying YouTube fan and as always Parasite Hilton. Could be a couple of good fights as Britney and Paris fight it out for attention. Maybe the crying he/she could get between them and get hurt frequently.

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18 Dec 2007 17:49 #11137 by Spooky
Replied by Spooky on topic Re: She's not a joke anymore...
This.Must.Continue.

Must

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19 Dec 2007 20:16 #11147 by angels
Replied by angels on topic Re: She's not a joke anymore...
I think the fact that she's currently such a mess makes this scenario that much more appealing. She's a crazed, arrogant woman who has been turned on by the population that once adored her, and now she wields unlimited power.
Berkhart, I'm chiming in with everyone else - please continue!

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20 Dec 2007 12:39 #11156 by Berkhart
Replied by Berkhart on topic Re: She's not a joke anymore...
Glad you liked it. Never really planned on writing anymore on this one, figured I'd leave the rest to everybody's imagination.

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