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The honking of geese (a notebook)

07 Jul 2016 19:36 - 10 Jul 2016 12:23 #49019 by AuGoose
Replied by AuGoose on topic The honking of geese (a notebook)

lojack wrote: You are a bad man. A very very bad man! :P


Katie made me do it :whistle: . Though honestly you should cherish the moment: it won't be nearly as thrilling when all the parts are assembled for the library.

But, props for the #Dickstarter hashtag, I laughed at that one! :laugh:


Credit for that pun actually goes to LustMonster, who's served as a very insightful focus group for KIBCs programming :).

I've been wrestling with some doubts about the remainder of the story, trying to find the sweet spot between some of my own proclivities and what'll play best to the larger audience (a dilemma I only resolved about an hour ago). Looking ahead, there's also increasing elements of plot and drama so folks looking for a pure fap-tastic ride might be a little disappointed.

LustMonster wrote:

Every breath was held--


Including MINE, dammit!


1... 2... 3... And breathe...

Fifteen Minutes of Fame (part 4)
by Au Goose

Warning: Spoiler!
Last edit: 10 Jul 2016 12:23 by AuGoose.
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07 Jul 2016 20:16 #49020 by LustMonster
Replied by LustMonster on topic The honking of geese (a notebook)

1... 2... 3... And breathe...


WHEW!!!!!

Most excellent!

Poor weatherman -- IT'S ARMAGEDDON FOR THE BAY AREA!!

Credit for that pun actually goes to LustMonster


Returning the favor for his awesome "Hell's barbecue sauce", making its icky appearance in my "Expedition Part 4" story.

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08 Jul 2016 14:24 #49025 by jumperprime
Replied by jumperprime on topic The honking of geese (a notebook)
Whoa. 150 million? At this point, a fight between the SF Angel and Super Katie will be like an ordinary mortal vs. Supergirl with the SF Angel shattering her own hand punching Super Katie's unprecedented goddess abs.

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08 Jul 2016 15:35 #49026 by lojack
Replied by lojack on topic The honking of geese (a notebook)
That escalated quickly! She does only have five minutes and we have to be running out of time here, especially after the affiliate catch-up and the weather segment. I'm curious how she squeezes the last drops out and get to her final form. (I'm guessing the self mod ability goes away at the end of the five minutes, but the rest are hers to keep- a lifetime supply of powers, a copy of the home game, and Rice-a-Roni®, The San Francisco Treat®)

The big question isn't actually about her, but rather what is the entity getting out of this? It obviously had a reason to make the Angel the way it did, so it was getting something out of that arrangement. (Sexual energy sustains it?) Plus it doubted the million mark, and must be stuffed or even soaking in whatever it is getting at 150x and rising from that. Heck, she was squirming in her seat with excitement/desire when she saw the Angel lift ~2.5 tons of car/guys overhead, and she can do that feat now with a rather large train engine, with more to come.

Oh, and something tells me that ORCA is going to have much more than a handful when they come to have a chat with Katie. :)

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08 Jul 2016 15:56 #49027 by jumperprime
Replied by jumperprime on topic The honking of geese (a notebook)

lojack wrote: The big question isn't actually about her, but rather what is the entity getting out of this? It obviously had a reason to make the Angel the way it did, so it was getting something out of that arrangement. (Sexual energy sustains it?) Plus it doubted the million mark, and must be stuffed or even soaking in whatever it is getting at 150x and rising from that. Heck, she was squirming in her seat with excitement/desire when she saw the Angel lift ~2.5 tons of car/guys overhead, and she can do that feat now with a rather large train engine, with more to come.

Oh, and something tells me that ORCA is going to have much more than a handful when they come to have a chat with Katie. :)


Maybe the entity is just making Supergirls for the lulz, like DKC's The Alicia Chronicles?

As to ORCA having more than a handful when they come to chat with Katie: Well duh, her breasts are MUCH bigger than that already :P
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08 Jul 2016 15:57 #49028 by lojack
Replied by lojack on topic The honking of geese (a notebook)
Oh, thought re: Ella- Either she's getting something extra from Katie when this is over, or she's the paranatural that is feeding off the sexual energy of her converts.

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08 Jul 2016 21:27 - 10 Jul 2016 07:48 #49037 by AuGoose
Replied by AuGoose on topic The honking of geese (a notebook)

jumperprime wrote: Whoa. 150 million? At this point, a fight between the SF Angel and Super Katie will be like an ordinary mortal vs. Supergirl with the SF Angel shattering her own hand punching Super Katie's unprecedented goddess abs.


Funny you should mention that... Though sometimes the lesson 'there's always a bigger fish' doesn't go the way you'd expect...

lojack wrote: Oh, thought re: Ella- Either she's getting something extra from Katie when this is over, or she's the paranatural that is feeding off the sexual energy of her converts.


Chekhov's Gun does demand she have a little more to say before we're done, though she does have an un-credited role in sweeping up the snow from Katie's little foray into meteorology :).

Thanks for the open speculation :cheer:. It makes me feel better knowing that having the answers to these questions in mind almost before the first words were written was brain-sweat that'll pay off in grins later ;).

I did finally do my punch-up pass on part IV - Katie drew up her revised bucket-list :P along with some other new tidbits.

We now return to our National Katie-Day celebration, already in progress.

Fifteen Minutes of Fame (part 5)
by Au Goose

Warning: Spoiler!
Last edit: 10 Jul 2016 07:48 by AuGoose.
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08 Jul 2016 22:56 - 08 Jul 2016 22:58 #49038 by AuGoose
Replied by AuGoose on topic The honking of geese (a notebook)

lojack wrote: That escalated quickly! She does only have five minutes and we have to be running out of time here, especially after the affiliate catch-up and the weather segment.

Yeah. While many things are happening in parallel and a lot of the inter dialogue is the matter of a split second, ultimately I've found and patched in so many little gags since I started that I'll probably retitle it Fifteen Minutes of Fame, It'll take a little juggling and clean-up, but probably for the best. Innitally I was pushing for a tight race, but gawd it's been fun watching her cavort on stage.

I'm curious how she squeezes the last drops out and get to her final form. (I'm guessing the self mod ability goes away at the end of the five minutes, but the rest are hers to keep- a lifetime supply of powers, a copy of the home game, and Rice-a-Roni®, The San Francisco Treat®)

That's much in line with my own sense of the wager. If that doesn't come through I'll need to polish the early dialogue with the Voice a little more.

The big question isn't actually about her, but rather what is the entity getting out of this? It obviously had a reason to make the Angel the way it did, so it was getting something out of that arrangement. (Sexual energy sustains it?) Plus it doubted the million mark, and must be stuffed or even soaking in whatever it is getting at 150x and rising from that. Heck, she was squirming in her seat with excitement/desire when she saw the Angel lift ~2.5 tons of car/guys overhead, and she can do that feat now with a rather large train engine, with more to come.

Oh, and something tells me that ORCA is going to have much more than a handful when they come to have a chat with Katie. :)

Most shall be revealed... :whistle:
Last edit: 08 Jul 2016 22:58 by AuGoose.

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09 Jul 2016 01:44 #49040 by lojack
Replied by lojack on topic The honking of geese (a notebook)
Well, now she's gong to need some footwear, and possibly a spare costume......
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10 Jul 2016 08:45 - 10 Jul 2016 16:05 #49047 by AuGoose
Replied by AuGoose on topic The honking of geese (a notebook)
Well, its been a fun ride and I've had my own ups and downs shepherding it along. KIBC is proud to present the penultimate act of our program, part six in a seven part series...

Fifteen Minutes of Fame (part 6)
by Au Goose

Warning: Spoiler!
Last edit: 10 Jul 2016 16:05 by AuGoose.
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10 Jul 2016 13:59 #49049 by slim36
Replied by slim36 on topic The honking of geese (a notebook)
Finally the fantasies stored in massive server farms around the world can escape. The web of fiber optic cables delivers an apocalyptic blast of terabits to Katie. The final product is the Red Matter from Star Trek that creates black holes and allows for alternate universes and unending sequels.
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10 Jul 2016 23:40 - 11 Jul 2016 00:09 #49056 by LustMonster
Replied by LustMonster on topic The honking of geese (a notebook)
At this point I feel unable to offer any intelligent or constructively witty comment.

Mouth open...

Tongue hanging out...

Drooling...

I probably should just shut up, but at least I gotta say...

This story is so fucking AWESOME!

Please bring on the earth-cracking FINALE...
Last edit: 11 Jul 2016 00:09 by LustMonster.

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11 Jul 2016 15:12 - 11 Jul 2016 16:34 #49071 by AuGoose
Replied by AuGoose on topic The honking of geese (a notebook)
And now for the conclusion of our broadcast, without further commercial interruptions.

Fifteen Minutes of Fame (part 7)
by Au Goose

Warning: Spoiler!
Last edit: 11 Jul 2016 16:34 by AuGoose.
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11 Jul 2016 15:42 #49072 by koopa
Replied by koopa on topic The honking of geese (a notebook)
That's some INTENSE and HIGH LEVEL honking mr AU Goose. Really enjoyed this one. Ella's "power-up" sequence has got to be one of the hottest piece of uber-transformation I've ever read. Thank you for sharing and writing this so quickly.

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11 Jul 2016 15:46 #49073 by lojack
Replied by lojack on topic The honking of geese (a notebook)
Yay Ella!

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13 Jul 2016 03:41 - 13 Jul 2016 22:16 #49097 by Sarge395
Replied by Sarge395 on topic The honking of geese (a notebook)
I think this is going into a top 10 story for me now. WoW!

When can we expect the finished full version to hit the library?
Last edit: 13 Jul 2016 22:16 by Sarge395. Reason: Added library comment
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10 Aug 2016 16:27 - 12 Aug 2016 06:19 #49534 by AuGoose
Replied by AuGoose on topic The honking of geese (a notebook)
Thanks for the kind words all :).

Ulterior Motives is not forgotten! Circe's Cup kindly delivered a much needed Gib-smack to the back of my noggin in the form of simply asking me what was wrong - and trying to answer the question shook more loose than weeks of staring at the story directly. While I'm not returning to it immediately, I understand where the snag occurred - despite the order I've posted pieces in, there will be a section added that precedes rather than follows the last installment. Doing that sequence as a recounting of events instead of letting the readers live through those events directly was dumb, and made me choke up every time I tried to script it that way.

Sorry for the mental gymnastics for the readers, but that's the price of seeing text before it's what I'd consider "Library Ready". Hopefully the look inside another writer's process is of value in it's own right :).

In the interim, the muse has been teasing me something fierce with two stories with very different Origins and themes. I'm trying to write out what I think will be the shorter one quickly before I lose my grasp on either thread.
The Last Bouquet (part 1)
by Au Goose


Warning: Spoiler!
Last edit: 12 Aug 2016 06:19 by AuGoose.
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11 Aug 2016 11:51 - 14 Aug 2016 23:15 #49544 by AuGoose
Replied by AuGoose on topic The honking of geese (a notebook)
Just puttering along trying to clear my plate :).
The Last Bouquet (part 2)
by Au Goose

Warning: Spoiler!
Last edit: 14 Aug 2016 23:15 by AuGoose.
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11 Aug 2016 14:21 #49545 by circes_cup
Replied by circes_cup on topic The honking of geese (a notebook)
I'm intrigued by your new approach to story development -- rough draft here and final one in the library. I might try that someday. If you think it would be best to reorganize mmotives, I wouldn't hesitate to do that. It is all part of the drafting process that you have opened up for everyone to see.

I'm also really intrigued by Last Bouquet. It's a little on the dark side, which I personally like. Can't wait to see more of this one!

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12 Aug 2016 20:18 - 12 Sep 2016 15:19 #49571 by AuGoose
Replied by AuGoose on topic The honking of geese (a notebook)
Freight. Train. ;)
The Last Bouquet (part 3)
by Au Goose

Warning: Spoiler!
Last edit: 12 Sep 2016 15:19 by AuGoose.
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13 Aug 2016 03:38 #49577 by circes_cup
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Just finished the five parts of mmotives that have been published. The erotic scenes are phenomenal -- the transformation, the encounter with her high school friend, and then the one done in the second person. These are scenes I'll be turning back to for years! Great stuff!

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14 Aug 2016 10:34 - 14 Aug 2016 10:41 #49596 by AuGoose
Replied by AuGoose on topic The honking of geese (a notebook)
Heh :). Thank you. Definitely a couple of experiments there. Second person is... unfamiliar? I felt a little like a table-top RPG gamemaster talking dirty to a willing, even eager player. Several female readers have indicated they did like having it croon in their ear :).

The first part is still pretty crucial... the luxurious description that the reader should be armed with going forward so I don't have to word-worship Hannah's super-body every time :whistle:. The lunch scene had a couple of problems already raising an itch for me... I've gone back and made a few changes that may make it a little more fun in the last day or so. Better word flow at the very least. We get a lot of takes on uber-sex around here so I did actively want to show how other power-sets might amuse themselves. No one but me could be expected to re-read this stuff as often as I tweak it, but you might give part 4 another chance at some point :). The good news is a full re-read on my part to apply edits is also a necessary step to refreshing my feel for the character's different voices.

The Last Bouquet briefly ran off the rails with my first try at the next scene being too focused on bringing forward Rose's big debut. Definitely one of those "No... Stop. What does the story and the reader actually need next? You can trot out Rose any time." Sometimes the desire for immediate feedback on a finished scene tries to club dramatic pacing over the head :P:. A more correct scene is brewing, but there will probably be no update today. Part III did get a pretty extensive polish pass starting from where Jane catches up with the killer, getting a full transformation sequence that should foreshadow a lot of what's to cum. -er, come.
Last edit: 14 Aug 2016 10:41 by AuGoose.

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18 Aug 2016 07:32 #49669 by circes_cup
Replied by circes_cup on topic The honking of geese (a notebook)
On Last Bouquet, the scene at the Vegas hotel was dynamite. I really like the way you combined the evilness of the supergirl with the POV of another woman trying to stop her. I had never thought of doing that. Most evil supergirl stories are told from the perspective of the evil one, but it's hard for a reader to empathize with the evilness. Telling it from the perspective of a cop hell-bent on stopping the evil is a great way to go.

I love throwing of furniture. And I love the pacing of the action -- was a real page turner.
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08 Sep 2016 05:47 - 20 Sep 2016 17:54 #50148 by AuGoose
Replied by AuGoose on topic The honking of geese (a notebook)
Made a little progress on last Bouquet. Crime stories are kinda odd the way you really need to know what actually happened in pretty good detail before you go back and layer confusion and mistakes over that to get the story the protagonist knows. I've been trying to work the path of events for the Hong Kong murder than broke Agent Monroe's career. Think I've got it now.

I've also updated "The Lioness: a tactical superheroine" with some much needed edits. Its not a new story, but if it's been a while, you might check in. Hopefully some of the concerns with the back and forth journey though memory have been addressed.

And a small ditty that came to me while out running errands. No idea if I'll repurpose it for another story, add to it, or just enjoy the moment. Either way, I need to write more, so I'z trying to write more.

Best. Day. Ever.
By Au Goose
Warning: Spoiler!
Last edit: 20 Sep 2016 17:54 by AuGoose.
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10 Sep 2016 14:14 #50179 by LustMonster
Replied by LustMonster on topic The honking of geese (a notebook)
Best Day Ever is getting really good. It behooves all you dear readers to scroll up a few inches and give it another read. The Master Honker continues to weave his magic spell across the pixelly-printed page...

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