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How to Make a Bat Sandwhich

Written by AuGoose :: [Sunday, 04 June 2017 14:48] Last updated by :: [Sunday, 04 June 2017 17:50]

How to Make a Bat Sandwich

by AuGoose


A work of erotic fiction (NSFW). Any resemblance to anything or anyone in the real world is far too much to hope for. Practice food safety.


Batman hadn’t lasted this long in his chosen vocation without having developed a keen sense for ambushes. As innocent as the slim blonde might look, his finding Kara El — Supergirl — leaning against the wall outside the Watchtower dining area was not a chance encounter. She was waiting for him.

As he turned the corner she arched her back seductively, accentuating her breasts. “Notice anything different?” She wheedled, gentle swells of flesh straining even Kryptonian fabric nearly to the breaking point. Childish overkill, making her point. She’d known precisely how to aggravate him almost from the moment she’d arrived on Earth as a teenager. The years had made her a young woman, but she’d never lost that infuriatingly bubbly spirit. Or that ability to get under his cowl with her carefree attitude.

“I see you’ve gained 3mm at the bust line.” He said automatically, having observed and catalogued that fact reflexively, even before she’d started her display. Then the importance the question – and answer – had for her struck him. “Congratulations,” he added sincerely, though not warmly.

“I know! It’s great!” She smiled broadly. “Karen’s teaching me.” She rolled her shoulders back, lifting her quite lovely curves right in his face. Actually, she had to leave the ground and rise seven inches to really fill his field of view with her modest cleavage, but she could do that too. Super. Girl.

He stepped around her smoothly, still chiefly intent on getting a meal. Then what she’d said hit him. “Teaching you … what? Exactly?”

“Duh,” she said, thrilled to know anything he didn’t.

“Don’t gloat, Kara.” Power Girl called out from inside the large room beyond the archway. “He couldn’t know. And let the man eat. He’s got monitor duty in an hour.” While she was a ‘Kara’ too, Power Girl had always allowed the younger twin to use the name when they were together, sticking with Karen.

“… He’s gonna need it” she added, cryptically.

Batman began loading a plate from the steam table at the side of the hall. They had a master chef for the designated meal times and formal gathering of the League, but there was always hot food on hand. The life of a global champion of Justice didn’t always stick to a clock. The mass of meat, carbs, and grease gathered on his plate would have killed most men, but he had a rather active lifestyle helping him burn it off.

He sat down with Power Girl, who also had an alarmingly hearty platter in front of her. But like every other part of her life, she attacked it with gusto. Between mouthfuls she explained.

“Kara wanted to figure out why we’re so different. Emphasis on the ‘figure’ part.” she joked.

He only nodded, still chewing. She smirked at Batman. Their “differences” were something of a running gag world-wide. Most people didn’t even know they were actually dimensional twins. Even if they were both blond and could tip over mountains.

“We’re different ages of course, vagaries of our time stuck in the phantom zone. Still, by our best guess I’m only 3 years older … but at her age I wasn’t nearly as …”

“You can say it: flat. Scrawny.” Supergirl chirped while picking at a salad. She looked at the lettuce as if it might be the culprit.

“I’d have said ‘trim’, dear.” Karen put a hand on her smaller ‘sister’s head and ruffled her long hair fondly. Letting it grow out like that was something she’d never been able to master. She still had no idea how Kara managed to comb it.

Batman held in a smirk. Kara was anything but flat or scrawny. She was a beautiful young woman in her own right. Athletic and well-formed. Along with being one of the three most incredibly powerful aliens on Earth. Those words fit her poorly in any context save one: standing next to Karen. But since Karen’s arrival from a parallel world, Kara had been in her company weekly, often daily, and the comparisons had to weigh on her. Doubly so after they’d confirmed she was another Kara El, identical right down to her KDNA. Just … bigger.

“So that’s not it.” Kara went on. “We started comparing other things. Little stuff. It took us a few days to suss it out …”

Bats resisted the urge to ask, masking his growing curiosity behind another mouthful of meat. She’d tell him anyway.

Karen saw he was playing hard to get, but that’s Bats on even a good day. She went on, knowing she had his attention now. “Turns out her version of our mother hadn’t gotten around to telling her about the ‘Birinees and the Buzzles’ before sending her off.” Karen explained with a flourish.

He suppressed a smile with long practice. It still amazed him how even on worlds half a galaxy apart, certain turns of phrase seemed almost universal. Though Clark’s description of Kryptonian reproductive practices had sounded rather more … sterile.

In a flicker, Supergirl was suddenly between them, rubbing her chest against Power Girl’s, making the comparison more than obvious. Karen seemed like she hardly noticed the sudden closeness that was pretty much the definition of lascivious, her own spectacularly full bosom still utterly dwarfing Kara’s. She just went right on eating as Supergirl ground against her in a way that would have caused car crashes and maybe even riots if they’d been in public. It was a reminder to Bruce that the two of them really did have a genuinely alien sense of personal space. Unlike Clark, they’d been raised in an entirely different culture, one literally not-of-this-Earth.

Even as she was pressing her chest against her sister’s, Supergirl looked at Batman with big innocent eyes. “I’m not getting enough sex.” Supergirl summarized.

That made him choke and sputter on the hunk of meat he was chewing. A sight so rare Supergirl immediately burst into laughter, having had no idea her many powers included the ability to make the Dark Knight blush. Then the realization she DID have some small power over him brought a flush to her own cheeks. She’d never dared try flirting with him before.

Karen reached around Supergirl and thumped Bruce on the back gently as he coughed up the half-chewed morsel. “I have sex every day, of course. But that’s just maintenance for me. I could get bigger with a real push.” She turned to face Supergirl. “So could you, naturally. Same genes, after all.”

“B-bigger?” Supergirl stammered, surprised by this new revelation.

“Sure. And don’t worry: I won’t mind. It’s not a competition. You probably should try it, at least for a little while so you can decide on where you want to settle at.” She leered at them both. “Make an informed decision. You might like ‘em HYOOGE. It’s not like we get back pains carrying our 'Super-Racks' here on Earth …”

‘This has to stop,’ Batman decided. It was cruel. “Karen, stop teasing her. Sex does NOT make your breasts grow. That’s just an urban myth.”

Karen corrected him. “It’s not a myth on Krypton. We’re more evolved than humans, Bruce. Our bodies respond to the demands we place on them. Kal would never be as strong as he is without all the fighting. He rises to the occasion. You must have seen that pattern. But it extends to more than just muscle for us K-girls. So these-” She hefted her world famous bosom, “-are like your muscles. When you train, they get bigger. Same for us. My hips too. If we’re reproductively active, we get more reproductively ready. And if we work out harder …

“… They get bigger!” Kara finished, all smiles. She was practically in his lap now. She cupped her own pleasant but hardly large assets. “That’s the difference! Compared to her? When it comes to sex, I’m a couch potato.” She added plaintively “Mom didn’t tell meee anything. … And Kal hasn’t said a word …”

Karen smiled. “He probably doesn’t know, dear. He was only a baby. And he’s a guy. Its not like he grew up around Kryptonian women … Or knows what he missed.” She rolled her eyes. Lois was a lucky lady, but Kal really should have had more time to explore his heritage before settling down.

“But he’s got all the files. In the Fortress.” Kara insisted, half-certain that somehow this had all been a conspiracy against her.

Batman added, “Clark said that Krypton had moved beyond natural selection and biological maternity. That your babies were designed and gestated in exo-wombs.”

“You’re a detective, Bruce. Do you usually listen to one guy’s side of things and assume that’s the whole story? Probably a quarter of Krypton still had babies the same way as they do here right up to the last day." She gestured down at herself, then rubbed her hands over her broad powerful hips. "You think I can't have a baby with hips like these? And just about everybody still enjoyed intimacy. Its Sex, Bruce. We’re not neutered drones. Jor was like the high priest of the ‘no-touchie’ faction. There may be a teensy, tiny bit of bias in the reading library he sent on with his son …”

Kara giggled, “He always did seem a little stiff.” She said, remembering her own childhood before things went boom. “Mom used to tease him so much, but I never knew why before …” She reached out and wiped a bit of gravy off Bats' lips, before sucking it off her finger. It might have looked like she was teasing him, but he recognized she was still working up her own courage for something more direct …

He looked sternly at Power Girl, trying to head off the likely consequences of Kara’s growing confidence … and assertiveness. “Can she … Can she address the matter in private?” While Karen had obviously tended to her affairs with more discretion than he’d realized she was capable of, Kara the Younger would be the focus of world-wide objectification if word got out she was … active. About to be highly active by the sound of it. Hell, there’ be lines forming to help her 'exercise'.

“On Krypton, sure. There’d be alternatives. They call them Buzzles for a reason. And certain ointments. But nothing that can be reproduced here. No, it needs to be with men. Or women, I suppose. And given her complete inexperience, partners in peak physical condition, at least for the first few months. Know anyone like that around here?"

She couldn’t be suggesting …?

Karen's eyes narrowed, her pupils dilating slightly and her own long nipples beginning to live up to the moniker "Maid of Steel" as she remembered her own earliest conquests. "It’s a safety issue, Bruce. First few times she has a K-gasm, she will break anyone less than fully prepared. I know I did. More than once.” Her words were almost husky now.

A small smile crossed his face faster than he could suppress it. Just a flutter of his firm lips. Somewhere, some when, an unsuspecting young man had slipped between the sheets with a much more slender teenaged Karen … turned out the lights … and discovered he'd have been better off finding an actual Bengal Tiger in the bed.

Seeing only the smallest cracks his entirely predictable reluctance, she switched to another tact:

“Come on Bats, you have to know, intellectually at least, that every minute of every day, somewhere in the world there’s a woman pleasuring herself thinking of you. 24/7. Those replica Batman costumes people sell or make, those aren’t just for Halloween. They’re for the bedroom, more often than not. You're … iconic.

Batman nodded, grudgingly. He’d looked into the trend, but had put it the on a mental shelf, irrelevant to his mission. Uncertain what to do about it other than see that the royalties went to worthy charities.

“The odds of a woman thinking of you, they go way up when they’ve seen the Bat in person. And again, if the Bat has spoken to them, more if you've saved them … again if trained them.”

It was maybe the first time she’d ever seen him squirm, so tiny you’d have missed it without super-vision.

“So, is it really such a surprise Kara’s one of them?”

His eyes widened inside the cowl, just the slightest bit. “No …”

“I’ve heard her, Bruce. How do you think she got those 3mm this week? It was fantasizing about you as she limbered up for her first big KO. You’re the second most powerful man in her world, Bruce. The tall dark and handsome gravelly voice of experience. You’re also maybe the only man she’s ever met or will meet that knowing the full extent of her power — really understanding what she could do — still isn’t intimidated by her. Hand her off to Grayson if you must, they’ll make a cute couple. But the first time? It’s gonna be you.”

“It really is,” Supergirl announced, reminding them that no amount of whispering would actually keep their conversation private. Then she was in his chair with him, pressed so tight she was tearing gouges into the armor covering his chest with her achingly perky breasts as she moved up and down against him. State of the art alloys vs. her super nipples was no contest at all, though she liked the way it tickled and the way it made him pant for her. She was irresistible and she damn well knew it.

He grabbed her slender wrists, straining to pry her off with moves that would have sent Killer Croc flying in a howl of pain. She ignored him, peeling apart the heavy armored pads she’d already shredded, revealing his broad chest. Her own top had vanished somewhere during the process and he'd never seen her move.

She licked him from the base of his sternum to the hollow between his collar bone and neck before looking him closely in the eye, scanning his reactions with the precision of a polygraph -- a skill he'd taught her. “Don’t you want me to grow? To be a big girl now? Karen says it’s pretty fast if you’re aroused enough." She snuggled closer, pressing her breasts into his chest. “ …I’m. Very. Aroused. In fact I think I feel it starting …”

He didn't need to look down to know she was right: he could feel it. But he glanced at the swell of her breasts anyway, impressed by their softness despite their ability to shed bullets. But she wanted him to be sure, so she pulled his hands to her chest. It was almost comical, how much smaller and weaker she looked while controlling his every movement with absolute ease. Millions of times stronger than him. Super. Girl.

She licked her lips and coo’d when he didn’t let go. Karen had promised it would feel good but this …! Oh, those HANDS of his!

She tore his sleeves off next, ripping down from the shoulder seams. “You can squeeze harder. Not like that. … I said ‘Harder’! You can’t hurt me Bats. Not my body anyway. But you’ll hurt my feelings if you keep saying ‘no’." She felt his hands tighten. Rao! He was so puny, and yet it felt so good. Her whole body shivered. She could feel her metabolism ramping up in a way that catching bank robbers or punching through asteroids had never gotten her pumped. "I want you. I’ve always wanted you …”

'I want you … and I want Karen’s Big Titties!' Kara silently amended to herself, arching her back even more. Lucky her: they were a package deal!

Bats managed to stand, but only because Kara allowed it. He started to back away, but Power Girl appeared behind him, pinning him in place with her immovable closeness. She whispered in his ear “She’s of age, Bats. Here and on Krypton. And she can make her own choices. Hell, this time next year she’ll be drinking. I’ve already asked J’onzz to take your shift. You’re not getting out of this.”

He’d been right about the ambush, he just hadn’t realized it was Karen’s. Kara would never have been so bold if Karen hadn’t put her up to it. But now that she'd reached this point, there'd be no stopping her. The dilation of her eyes, the flush of her cheeks, the blood engorging her lips and nipples. She was giving off every signal he knew. She was going to have him …

Kara turned her back to him and bent forward, a suspiciously convenient breeze flipped her red skirt up. Before her could get a good look at the rounded treasures beneath she was grinding her cannon-ball ass against his groin. “I’ll let you do anything to me … Anything. I want you to.” Her voice still so innocent, a girl mouthing the words without really knowing what they mean, no idea what 'anything' was code for. She clenched her butt cheeks, ripping the carbon fiber crotch out of his leggings with a single shrug of her rounded buttocks. Cute party trick, and easy if you’re Supergirl. She turned back to face him. She looked him deep in the eyes again before dropping to her knees before him.

“But after that, I’m gonna do everything I want to YOU!” When she said it, 'everything' was code for everything.

She tore his famous utility belt off next, rolling into a ball and then stuffing it into her own deepening cleavage. She cupped her swelling breasts in her hands and pressed them together, crushing the belt into scrap. The handful of micro-grenades he kept there went off with nothing but muffled pops to announce their destruction, the force swallowed up by her creamy flesh. “Huff! Oh? That felt nice …”

Power Girl just laughed. She hadn’t gotten around to suggesting explosive stimulation yet. Girl was a fast learner!

Kara leaned in finally, taking his stiff member into her mouth and started to suck. It wasn’t skillful, but it was certainly effective. It didn’t help PeeGee had wrapped her arms around his bare chest and was playing with his recently bared man-nipples like she knew a lot about teasing nipples. Hers were a pair of railroad spikes pressing into his back.

“My … Quarters … Now.” He hissed through his teeth.

In a moment of sympathy for his dignity, Power Girl peeled Supergirl off of him and flew them both to his Spartan quarters in the blink of an eye. She even shut the door in deference to his human sensibilities. The hum of the Watchtower reactors dropped to less than a whisper. He had excellent sound proofing she realized, wondering what else he might have gotten up to in there.

Supergirl, now entirely naked, spread herself out on the bed, opening herself to him like a pale flower: long legs raised, her innermost petals pink with the hot blood pounding through her. Her clenched toes pointed like arrows at opposite walls of the room, her strong thighs spread wide enough to make even a cheerleader cry. Then unwilling to limit herself to Earth-girl levels of enticing, she floated three inches up off of the bed, defying artificial gravity as easily as she did the genuine article. She waited, offering herself and gazing at him longingly, but she wouldn’t wait long. The new hormones seething in her system wouldn't let her.

Still he held back. Pride more than any intellectual objection. In some ways pleased: all of this was only happening because she trusted him. Trusted that he wouldn't ever hurt her …

Karen laid the heel of her palm against his tailbone fingers down, she slipped a finger into the crack of his ass, the last joint penetrating him with gentle but irresistible pressure. The tip of her finger vibrated inside him at the lowest note a man could hear and in moments he was rock hard again, the muscles of his whole torso seizing with pleasure. Then using him like an oversized finger puppet, she slid him into Kara’s waiting loins.

The blonde sylph exploded into orgasm with the first plunge and Bats wasn’t far from doing the same. She grabbed her breasts and began mauling them, willing them to grow as she moaned, overcome by the feeling of his meat inside her at last. She came, and came, and came, and then sensing what it was doing to her body, to her growing TITS, she came again. Thankfully with her stamina, she could collide head-on with several million more orgasms and never need to stop. Super. Girl.

A small, detached part of Bruce’s mind duly noted Kara had already gained another 5mm even after the burst of growth that had devoured his utility belt. Fifteen seconds of coitus as effective as a week of masturbation, apparently. And as promised, her hips were widening. 'Remarkable, though early gains in any training regimen were often the greatest.' he thought, wrapping himself in cool logic as if he were watching the whole scene on a screen in the Batcave. A technique usually reserved for resisting torture. His body might be a cock-puppet in Karen's hands but his mind was his own. The Batman never gave in.

Power Girl’s lips were at his ear, whispering, “I’m not kidding Bats: you owe her. You owe her at least a dozen nights for your behavior when she first arrived. Make it right.” She continued to work his hips one handed while the slimmer Kara squealed in delight.

The older Kara felt his inconsequential but determined resistance fade. She’d gotten through to him. Obligation was something he understood. Reciprocity. He held up a commanding hand, signaling her to stop. He might be just a man and she a Kryptonian goddess, but even she ignored such a command at her peril. This mortal had ended gods before. Karen trusted his gesture was simply a sign he'd become a willing partner and released him from her grip.

He slid sinuously out from between the cage of spectacular legs, slim and light, beefy and curvaceous. “We.” He slid off his gloves and began unbuckling his boots - all that was left of his costume now. “Will not speak of that again. The Batman is never a toy. Not even yours, Kara.” Naked now save for the iconic cowl, he reached into a closet, perfectly placed for maximum efficiency like everything in the stark room, and drew out a long black robe. It was like a piece of the night, without monogram or identification. Tens of thousands of dollars of the finest silk. An extraordinary extravagance for the relentless crusader and out of character with the grim warrior Karen knew him to be. Despite the color, it was something she’d never have guessed he owned. It seemed too soft, too decadent to belong to the Batman.

Draping it over his shoulders hid the worst of the scars on his arms and chest, while concealing nothing of the thickness of his broad pectorals, the cobbled power of his abdominals, or the flagpole-worthy length of his rigid penis, still slick with Kara's ample juices. He left the front open, untied.

Even Karen's breathing grew shallow at the sight. He was an awesome specimen of masculinity, an apex predator on a hundred different planets, she thought. The years and the wear only adding to his appeal. A worthy participant in her ‘little sister’s’ first real foray into Kryptonian womanhood. And what a first time it would be! Rao have mercy! Just the smells wafting off of Kara had her quivering. Kara's cells had to be fizzing, like deliberately shaking a can of soda before you opened it. At this rate, no human was going to believe what she'd look like by tomorrow …

At last he slipped off the cowl, undoing even the most clever latches with long familiarity. A complex task that had cost many villains their consciousness and even their freedom for attempting.

He cast it to the ground, never taking his eyes off Kara. An ancient symbol of complete separation. And total commitment to the task at hand. If it had been a sword scabbard cast to the floor it would have signaled a duel to the death. He was that serious about what came next.

He ran his broad, powerful hands over his face, smirking briefly at the stubbly feel of the five o’clock shadow usually so completely concealed. For a moment, he ruffled his cropped black hair, returning it to a more natural fall over his large skull. The most casual gesture Karen or Kara had ever seen him make. Even the legendary Batman got ‘cowl-hair’ it seemed.

In a flickering rearrangement in the tension of his facial muscles the years of wisdom, of mentorship, and hard-earned respect fell away and a softer, more pleasant man was revealed. A full-grown man whose eyes still twinkled with boyish mischief. All but unrecognizable as being the same person despite the lantern jaw the two men shared.

“… However” A gentle, even kind voice went on. “I personally would like to apologize to you my dear. For past offenses. And to do everything in my power to bring out your … maximum potential. We have what? I’d say about 382 millimeters to go. We can try for another ten centimeters, right now, if you like. I mean, really make sure you have to throw out all your old bras. That is, if you're up for it.”

Kara just stared. Shocked beyond words. Was he … was he taunting her? "Oh, I'll SHOW YOU what I'm up for, buster!" she half-shouted, the fires in her loins burning hotter than ever now. 'Old bras' indeed! Like her puppies ever needed one of those stupid contraptions to keep from sagging! She was gonna get so big she could drown that man’s arrogance in tit!

Power Girl snickered, watching Bruce throw Kara around with emotional judo as easily as he tossed most people with his hands. Then she realized he'd simultaneously been speaking to her, teasing that he’d eyeballed her bust to within a millimeter, maybe less. Rao's dangling nutsack! She KNEW Bruce had been ogling her same as the rest boys in the club! The man just couldn’t resist showing off. He was working them both over, his revenge for her little challenge to his dignity. The bastard even smirked at her, having foreseen the exact moment she'd work it out. She growled. Now she wanted to fuck the smug out of him almost as bad as Kara was going to!

Then he was all over Kara, sprawled waiting on his bed, Bruce Wayne, the Billionaire Playboy truly in his element. His other life, something he sometimes neglected but never forgot. And in that life he certainly hadn’t overlooked the need to be a world class lover to support the rakish reputation: one of America’s most eligible and sought out bachelors. A persona so unlike his dour alter ego … and far better equipped to render aid in this case.

Kara was in heaven. He was every bit as skilled as she’d imagined. More than she could have imagined, really. The things he was doing to her! As good as his willing and able dick felt inside her, what she concentrated on most was his hands. Those big paws of his, so quick and precise. She told him she was ready for 'anything', but she'd been so wrong! She accidentally burnt an arc up one wall and across the ceiling when he slipped two fingers there. And there. And --OOO!-- Yeah, there too.

For now his hands completely engulfed her breasts, but she knew, maybe not today or tomorrow, but soon he’d no longer be able to cover her breasts with them. Not even one of her great big beautiful tits using both hands if she had her way. She'd take him again and again until his hot seed turned her into Superwoman

As requested, Bruce Wayne fucked the "trim" and "slender" right out of Kara, working her body 14 kinds of hard. Techniques from the night clubs of L.A. to the heights of the Himalayas. He gave her girlish body a relentless pounding that would have broken the bones of even a strong woman like Talia. He was holding nothing back with a partner who was literally unbreakable. He slapped her ass hard enough to knock a man unconscious and couldn't even leave a palm print on her muscular white buttocks. He RAVAGED her creamy breasts, and she laughed as they only jiggled … And grew. He did his worst and it only made Kara better. She was blooming, already looking shapelier, her hips betraying a new flare and an easy 10mm further around in the bust. He paused, as much to catch his breath as to allow her to do the same … only to find she went right on fucking him during his brief mental intermission. He realized just how focused he’d been in his duties: he’d entirely missed that Power Girl was hovering naked high in one corner of his bedroom, one breast to her mouth and the other hand attending to matters further south. Watching them rut with a kind of proud delight.

“Oh, I’m sorry. How rude.” His hips still rocking as Kara continued to apply her handful of simple moves. With an almost absentminded press of his palm into the hollow above her hips, he adjusted the youth's angle 2 degrees, always the mindful teacher. Kara went rigid, her eyes rolling back in her head at the sudden blast of sensation when the tip of his dick now plowed through her white-sun supercharged K-spot, indescribably more pleasurable than a young Earth woman's G-spot. Then she was moving again, a series of hard grunts bursting from her and covering half the room in frost.

At the same time Bruce reached out a gentlemanly hand as if to help Karen down from a high step. “Would you care to join us, Karen?”

She reached out to take his proffered hand, not even bothering to wipe her sexual juices from her own. He was about to get covered in them anyway. An aphrodisiac super-lubricant unlike anything on Earth. “Why, Mr. Wayne … I thought you’d never ask …” She might enforce his repayment of debts owed as she saw them, but she’d never have imposed on him for her own gratification. It would be too easy for her to accidentally humble the human. But like a vampire invited across the threshold, she fell upon him with barely checked passion, her rising cries mingling with her twin's.

And that is how you make a Bat Sandwich.

Epilogue

Outside, Superman gently nudged the Watchtower back into its proper orbit. They were really going at it in there. At first he’d been scandalized listening in on their exchange in the dining hall from the shuttle bay. But he’d learned it was better to just trust the older Kara on matters of Kryptonian decorum … doubly so on ‘womanly issues’. There was no winning an argument with a woman who had changed your diapers. Truth be told, he’d never even heard of the ‘Birinees and the Buzzles’. He’d long come to suspect the there was a deliberate gap in the information contained in the files bequeathed to him in the Fortress of Solitude. No mention at all of sex, even historically. No … He was pretty sure Power Girl was right: his biological father had just been a complete prude. Certainly Pa Kent had shared a bawdy tale or two from his own teenage years. The man had been a wild stallion ‘til Ma had tamed him, to hear both them tell it.

Kal had gone outside hoping to respect their privacy (while also keeping the station from falling out of orbit as they bounced off the walls in a tangle). Even so, he could still feel their cries thrumming along the hull. J’onzz had just started laughing and hadn’t stopped as he’d taken over monitor duty. He’d made it very clear he thought Bruce had needed a good shagging more than even the normally timid Kara did. “The guy’s kinda … tense.”

With a boyish smile of his own, Clark resolved to get the elder version of his cousin to have a woman-to-woman chat with Lois. Who knew what surprises Karen might be able to pass along for the couple to share? Birinees and Buzzles indeed!

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