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The 10 Best Super Villainesses!

26 Feb 2009 22:16 #14969 by Berkhart
The 10 Best Super Villainesses! was created by Berkhart
There are so many types of women that strike me as great potential super villainesses. More than just their looks (even though that is important!), these women have certain personalities and traits that drive my imagination wild. The upcoming list won't necessarily focus on specific girls, but certain stereotypes. Hope you all enjoy...

#10: The Dumb Blonde

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The dumb blonde doesn't necessarily start off as a bad girl. Maybe she's a sweet, if slightly ditzy woman. Over time though, the constant "dumb blonde" jokes start to wear on her patience. Even if she isn't the sharpest knife in the drawer, she still has feelings.

What if she suddenly develops super powers though?

Those who had fun at her expense, will suddenly find themeselves confronted with an offended girl with the strength of an army. And while she might not know how to screw in a lightbulb, she certainly knows how to toss a smug, insensitive clod into orbit with a tiny flick of her wrist! For the rest of the world, this dity clutz's regular "case of the oopsies" could carry global consequences...

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27 Feb 2009 23:54 #14978 by Berkhart
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#9: Prostitutes

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Maybe it's the outfits. They do seem to dress a lot like a good number of comic book super women...

What happens if these girls get super powers?

Suddenly women who have lived their entire lives at the bottom of the social ladder, would have the means to move to the top. The world's wealth would be theirs for the taking, and there's nothing we could do to stop them. Something tells me super powered prostitutes would be eager to inflict some pain on a society that has looked down on them. Of course, the pimps, customers, and police might be in for some especially bad times...

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28 Feb 2009 15:11 #14984 by Berkhart
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#8: The Already Powerful

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A beautiful woman with power is great, but a beautiful woman who wants even more power? Awesome!

They already think they know what's best for the rest of us. Not only that, but they often have a sense of entitlement and privilege. After getting rejected and feeling humiliated thanks to the ballot box, what happens if she acquires more power than she could ever imagine?

She would happily rule the world with an iron fist, while sweeping aside any opposition with a puff of super breath. Our planet would be a playground for her to create whatever reality she chooses. Best of all for out super ruler, there are no term limits for the omnipotent!

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01 Mar 2009 15:03 #14990 by YAGS
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Cool idea for a thread. I'm curious to see what you come up with for the rest of the list.

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01 Mar 2009 15:50 #14992 by Berkhart
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#7: The Bully

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A bully is bad enough...but a bully with super human strength at her disposal...

...that would be a nightmare the world would never recover from.

The bully already causes misery in her realm by terrorizing those beneath her. Only an authority figure can keep this trouble maker under wraps. Unfortunately, a bully with the power of a god has nothing to fear from those who previously kept her under control. She would have no boundaries, and be free to create as much havoc as she pleases. Worse yet, we are all beneath this super hellion with a queen bee complex...

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01 Mar 2009 17:53 #14995 by ace191
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Great choice. I actually have a copy of this movie, "Mean Girls". No lie in that Title. Will Lindsay Lohan get powers too?

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01 Mar 2009 18:08 #14996 by argonaut
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Agreed. I based three of the characters in "Transformatrix 4000" on them.

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01 Mar 2009 23:25 #15001 by Berkhart
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Their super villainess potential would be pretty incredible. And I've always loved that picture of those three girls...they just look powerful with those poses and expressions.

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02 Mar 2009 02:05 #15005 by colt13
Replied by colt13 on topic Wow
Excellent topic! Sounds like a Marknew story.

Dumb Blonds- Marilyn Monroe.

Prostitutes- Heidi Fleiss(had to use the Madam).

Powerful Women-Already has that dream of Palin with powers and Hasselbeck as her sidekick.

Mean Girls-That is the best photo i have seen of those 3. My favorite is Seyfried and giving her powers would be so fetch.

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02 Mar 2009 21:24 #15021 by Berkhart
Replied by Berkhart on topic Re: The 10 Best Super Villainesses!
#6: Bond Girls

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I suppose this entry is a bit of a cheat, since these women are from the world of fiction, but hey, it's my list...

The Bond villainesses would be ideal super women: sexy, larger than life, and keen on the concept of world domination. I've always hated how the ladies tend to play second fiddle to the primary bad guy. Give these girls some uber power though, and watch out. Plus, I don't think a super Bond villainess would be overly bothered by exploding cufflinks and such

Watching the movie Goldeneye, I can't tell you how many fantasies I've envisioned where Xenia Onnatop gained super human strength!

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03 Mar 2009 04:43 #15023 by YAGS
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Yes! The chick from Goldeneye who got off on violence has always been a favorite of mine! I keep saying I need to pick up that DVD just so I can watch that again whenever I want, instead of just happening to catch it on TV once in a while.

As for the Mean Girls, good choice. And Lindsay Lohan was always my least favorite in that movie. The other 3 are much hotter.

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03 Mar 2009 11:26 #15027 by argonaut
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I favored Tina Fey, myself.

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03 Mar 2009 17:43 #15029 by Berkhart
Replied by Berkhart on topic Re: The 10 Best Super Villainesses!
#5: The Petty Tyrant

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I’m not talking about a third world dictator here, but somebody we’ve probably all encountered in everyday life...

She’s the unsympathetic girl in payroll, the small town policewoman, the boss’s secretary, or the chick who works in the DMV. In the grand scheme of things, this woman is pretty small time. Despite that reality though, she revels in the small amount of power she does possess, while making those who come before her miserable

What if this particularly vile woman woke up with super human abilities?

No longer would she be causing aggravation for a few anonymous souls...oh no. Suddenly she would have the power to control every single life on this planet. And she’d love every minute of it! Heaven help those people who run afoul against this unstoppable force of micromanagement...

By the way, Christina Hendricks (pictured above) just might have the most slammin’ body on the planet...if anybody has some spare super formula, I’d appreciate you sending it her way!

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04 Mar 2009 22:30 #15048 by Berkhart
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#4: The Crazy Psycho Bitch

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The crazy psycho bitch is probably the most dangerous super woman of them all. While the other women on this list will cause untold amounts of destruction, this bad girl will up the ante many times over. Worse, she is completely unpredictable.

A normal psycho chick is a menace to only a few people. Maybe she'll keep calling you and hang up all night. Or flip out and break a few dishes. Give her super powers though, and her rage takes on a truly global dimension.

Instead of throwing a few wine glasses against the wall, now she can level an entire city in minutes. Worse, if she flattens it too quickly, she'll use her super speed to carry to yet another metropolis...and another...and another. Within an hour of her super meltdown, the psycho bitch could easily obliterate an entire continent. That's pretty tame though for this nut job. As she would simply push Earth into the sun if she was really pissed off. In the end, with her god like power, coupled with severe mental issues, our civilization would be doomed if this kind of woman ever found herself with super human abilities...

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06 Mar 2009 03:06 #15057 by colt13
Replied by colt13 on topic Pic
The funny thing about the Christina Hendricks pic is that it is the worst one i have ever seen of her.

videogum.com/archives/interviews/the-emm...ndrickss_022991.html

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06 Mar 2009 20:25 #15063 by Berkhart
Replied by Berkhart on topic Re: The 10 Best Super Villainesses!
#3: This Woman

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Super powers are far more effective than guns when trying to topple the local government. She needs to work on her villainess costume though...I like the beret though.

It's debatable in how a woman in the "real world" would react to being granted super strength, but something tells me this girl would be more than willing to use her powers to the fullest extent. This one woman insurgency would be able to sweep away the government's army with a single puff of super breath.

Naturally, once she controls her country, it's only a matter of time before she sets her sights on the rest of the world.

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06 Mar 2009 20:55 #15064 by lfan
Replied by lfan on topic Re: The 10 Best Super Villainesses!
You know....I've been reading these updates for a few days and wondering if this is a good opportunity for re-kickstarting the fiction workshops with each "villainess" as a theme for the stories.....

Anyone second the motion?

ElF

#3: This Woman

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Super powers are far more effective than guns when trying to topple the local government. She needs to work on her villainess costume though...I like the beret though.

It's debatable in how a woman in the "real world" would react to being granted super strength, but something tells me this girl would be more than willing to use her powers to the fullest extent. This one woman insurgency would be able to sweep away the government's army with a single puff of super breath.

Naturally, once she controls her country, it's only a matter of time before she sets her sights on the rest of the world.

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06 Mar 2009 22:28 #15066 by argonaut
Replied by argonaut on topic Re: The 10 Best Super Villainesses!
As a variation: I wonder if we could find ten writers, each of whom would pick one of the "types" on Berkhart's list and submit a story about her? They'd have 1-2 months to finish their stories and send them to admin, who'd post them all at the same time.

Berkhart: I've been enjoying the countdown. Can't wait to see #2 and #1!

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07 Mar 2009 00:49 #15072 by angels
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That is a fantastic idea!

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07 Mar 2009 13:25 #15079 by Berkhart
Replied by Berkhart on topic Re: The 10 Best Super Villainesses!
#2: The Rap Star

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The rap star rarely gets attention as a possible super woman, but she has high potential for uber powered awesomeness in my book. These girls are insanely beautiful with their ultra curvy bodies and model like good looks, but that’s not what makes them among the ultimate super villainesses though.

Materialistic and short-tempered, the stereotypical rap star is an angry force with a major chip on her shoulder. Many of these girls came from rough backgrounds, and something tells me they would be eager to exploit their new, godly power. Super powers would be infinitely more enjoyable than even the best platinum card for this unstoppable cocoa goddess

Then there are their rivalries. The rap star always seems to have another rap star as an arch foe. Just imagine Super Lil Kim versus Super Foxy in the middle of Manhattan. Odds are the city would be leveled in under an hour...

For the rest of the world though, it would only be a matter of time before it ended up beneath one of these girl's stiletto boot

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08 Mar 2009 10:18 #15084 by YAGS
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Cool and unusual choice for the #2 spot. I like it. I'm curious to see who you'll have at #1.

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09 Mar 2009 14:30 #15090 by argonaut
Replied by argonaut on topic Re: The 10 Best Super Villainesses!
Two days and we're still waiting for Berkhart's #1 pick.

Based on his stories and previous posts, I'm guessing it will be one of the following ...

1. the Narcissist
2. the Celebrity
3. Divas of Women's Wrestling

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09 Mar 2009 14:34 #15091 by ace191
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I am thinking Paris Hilton here! The already clueless spoiled Bitch!

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09 Mar 2009 20:39 #15096 by Berkhart
Replied by Berkhart on topic Re: The 10 Best Super Villainesses!
#2 (tie): The Convict

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Ok, I know the vast majority of women in jail won’t look like our example, but for fantasy purposes I think she’ll do fine...

The convict is already half way there to being a super criminal (she’s already a criminal, so she just needs the super part!). There’s a reason why a woman like this is locked away... she poses a threat to society! Even without powers, she’s feared. Violent, cruel, and completely lacking remorse, this woman would likely bring an end to civilization as we know it, if she ever found herself possessing super abilities.

With the power of God at the (ex)convict’s finger tips, a uber crime wave would be the least of our concerns. If the threat of punishment wasn’t enough to reign in this hell raiser’s base instincts while she was normal, what’s to stop her when she’s completely invulnerable?

As an aside...

One of my favorite super woman fantasies has always been a suddenly super powered, sexy con breaking her way out of prison. The bending bars...the busted concrete walls...and guards being flung aside with contemptious ease...

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10 Mar 2009 00:02 #15101 by Berkhart
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#1: The Celebutante

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I guess I’m too predictable...Argonaut and ace191 pretty much hit it on the head. But Number One on the list is not just any celebrity, but more accurately, A Celebutane...

Yes, number one on my super villainess list is The Celebutante. She’s sexy, selfish, and completely unsuited for world domination. Really, just think about it: Paris Hilton with all the power she could ever want. Where would our world be if it was at her subject to her every spoiled whim? I could go but, "The Amazing Adventures of Super Paris" pretty much sums up the celebutante's villainess potential.

Of course, the only thing person who would be better in my fantasy would be a Korean or Chinese version of Paris or Kim Kardashian...

Anyway, hope you all enjoyed my little list. It was fun to compile it, and dream about all these women tearing the world apart for their various reasons.

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