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LaPorte Caves
Thanks for the update.circes_cup wrote: For those of you wonder what's going on with me, the answer is "a lot". I'm working away at writing new chapters, revising old ones, and retroactively adding a few scenes to the old chapters as well. It's taking lots of time.
The story that Ive published so far is longer than I had ever wanted it to be. The early chapters were slapped together pretty quickly and don't have the stuctural stength to support all the later material that has been piled on top. The whole thing is begginning to teeter. Some of you have been saying for a while, "hey, your building is teetering.". Others of you have been saying "don't sweat it, the view is good anyway." But if I continue adding more stories without fixing what's underneath, the whole thing is going to wind up on its side. And by the way, I'm not trained to be doing any of this, so it involves lots of tinkering.
So, with that as an update, I'm going to pop another can of milk with artificial raspberry flavoring and get back to it! Thanks guys.
I'm quite curious about what's working, what you think needs a bit of tinkering, and how the story has grown since you started, but for now I'll just let you get on with it. Looking forward to whatever's next.
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- Pepper
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"Wow! Geez" Wendy said through clenched teeth "never thought I'd grow like this and have all the power and strength!!"
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- Monty
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- jnw550
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jnw550 wrote: Haven’t heard anything in a few months. Hope all is well.
Same here.
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- Woodclaw
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Or fourthed, whatever.
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smoki07 wrote: Cool, After The good news about Baker's Dozen, you get another one. Looking forward for this.
I’m looking forward to it, too!
Monty, do me a favor and label it as “inspired by....” or “an extension of....” or something else that clarifies its relationship to the original story. The reason for that is mostly to help the reader reconcile any plot conflicts: I have several chapters yet to write before we can call this story done, and I’m revising the earlier stuff, so there is a good chance that your story and mine won’t mesh perfectly. Maybe I’m the only person that cares about plots meshing, but I do actually care about it.
If you’d like me to look at it before you post, let me know. But if you prefer just to post and be done, I completely understand that too. Can’t wait!
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- Monty
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I was just reviewing the art Lowerbase did inspired by the story. Some amazing stuff. Looking forward to seeing what comes of the review and edits to the story. Still probably the most thought provoking series on the site.
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- AuGoose
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I feel like I may be one of the critics, but I also hope you don't change it too much. I've gone back and re-read parts of it and I find my reaction is quite different depending on which character I choose to empathize and identify with at the time. If it ain't broke, don't fix it. If you can resolve the plot while staying true to the characters, I think you've really created a great story.circes_cup wrote: Monty, do me a favor and label it as “inspired by....” or “an extension of....” or something else that clarifies its relationship to the original story. The reason for that is mostly to help the reader reconcile any plot conflicts: I have several chapters yet to write before we can call this story done, and I’m revising the earlier stuff, so there is a good chance that your story and mine won’t mesh perfectly. Maybe I’m the only person that cares about plots meshing, but I do actually care about it.
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“Well, what do you think…?”
Howard looked up as Julia emerged from their bedroom in her Halloween costume. He chuckled “I love the supergirl outfit, very apt!”
It was good to be back home, back on Earth, back to ‘normality’. All of Julia’s superstrength had long since drained from her body, but she was more than happy (as was Howard) with her now slim, toned physique the Nourishment had left her with. She occasionally pined for those muscles, that body, those huge breasts, the Strength that would elevate her far beyond every human being here on earth. All just a sip away…if she wanted, but she knew her Howie wouldn’t approve. Unbeknownst to her boyfriend, Julia had carried gallons of the Nourishment single-handedly through the caves in a half-ton vat after yet another argument in the Weald. It had been stored in the loft, out of the way, out of reach, out of temptation…Perhaps…
“Are you ready to go, Julia?” as Howard waited impatiently in the car.
“Yes…ok dear, I’ll be right there. I’ll just fetch some more punch for the party”
“Julia! We’re now running late!”
“Sorry dear” as she opened the door, “I just wanted to bring an extra bottle.”
Howard’s younger brother Mark and his girlfriend were hosting the party which was in full swing when the couple arrived.
”Hey bro! Hi Julia! Where have you both been? We haven’t seen you for ages!”
“Ummm…we’ve both been on an extended hiking vacation” murmured Howard.
Julia giggled into her petite hand, Howard tutted.
Mark had been a good football player at college, working his way through a scholarship and at 6’ 2”, he was proud of his ‘strong’ physique. Howard’s brother towered above Julia flexing his arms by his side in his batman costume.
“I see you’ve lost a bit of weight with all the hiking Julia! Nice costume by the way, but you don’t look that super, Jules” chided Howard’s brother.
“Oh?....Really?” Julia replied as she made her way to the drinks table.
Howard sighed, if only his younger brother knew of the past misadventures he had worked through with his girlfriend.
“I’ve brought our own drinks with us, would you like to try some?” as she poured the first bottle knowingly and handed a glass to Mark. Mark looked at the glass with the strange liquid and sipped at the drink in his hand.
“UGH!” as he spat it out it. “That tastes gross Julia! What the hell is it?”
‘Glug, glug, glugglu…’
“Mmmmm” she closed her eyes and tilted her head back as she licked her lips.
“I think it tastes wonderful Mark! Don’t you agree?”
Mark looked on, mouth agape in disbelief as Julia’s arms began to burst at the very seams of her costume, those arms began to swell as she flexed her now huge super-enhanced Nourished muscles, her modest chest stretched out against the expanding ‘S’ on her costume. She soon towered above little Mark.
One finger of Julia's hand reached down to lift Howard’s brother off the floor...
“Great to see MY juice in action isn’t it Mark? Believe me, I am far way beyond what you termed ‘super’ now!”
“I didn’t think it would do much for you though” as she lowered him effortlessly to whisper in his ear.
“Would any of the ladies here care for a sip of my Punch?”
Howard’s head fell into his hands, ‘Oh no, Julia…’
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- Monty
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Putting it right next to the main story it gives me the creeps though. Considering how addictive the Nourishment is, Julia spinking the punch with it is a terrifying perspective.
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Woodclaw wrote: Well, the story is certainly a very nice vignette with a smooth execution. I can see this being an "alternate reality" of sort to the main LaPorte storyline.
Putting it right next to the main story it gives me the creeps though. Considering how addictive the Nourishment is, Julia spinking the punch with it is a terrifying perspective.
Hi Woodclaw. The short short isn't 'right next to the main story'. If it was, it would be in the library, and not the story comments section where lots of interesting comments and ideas have been posted about circes's thought-provoking work. I had the short take of the vignette in my head for several months, but never got it down and posted here until I cleared the take with circes through pm's and e-mails.
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- Monty
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Monty wrote: Hi Woodclaw. The short short isn't 'right next to the main story'. If it was, it would be in the library, and not the story comments section where lots of interesting comments and ideas have been posted about circes's thought-provoking work. I had the short take of the vignette in my head for several months, but never got it down and posted here until I cleared the take with circes through pm's and e-mails.
It wasn't meant as a critique, just a random thought I had reading you piece.
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- Woodclaw
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Monty, thanks for offering up this fun little vignette. It’s got a light, tongue-in-cheeck feeling very similar to SteveTheZ’s stuff.... like “aw, gosh darn it, we just altered the fate of humanity”. I feel like I’ve seen other stories of yours, and liked them, but when I went back a few minutes ago, I couldn’t find any in the library. In any event, I hope you keep writing.
For those that wish to know, I’ve spent lots of time — too much time — trying to rework and finish LPC. I certainly haven’t forgotten about it. I have no idea when I’ll be posting more. You’ll know as soon as I do.
Circes
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circes_cup wrote: Yes, when Woodclaw said “gives me the creeps”, I think he has saying it as a reader wondering what happens when this stuff gets into a punchbowl, not as an admin objecting to the presence of the story. Regardless, I’m fine with it.
That pretty much what I was trying to say. 90% of the time when I post here I'm just doing so as a reader and a contributor, not as an admin.
circes_cup wrote: Monty, thanks for offering up this fun little vignette. It’s got a light, tongue-in-cheeck feeling very similar to SteveTheZ’s stuff.... like “aw, gosh darn it, we just altered the fate of humanity”. I feel like I’ve seen other stories of yours, and liked them, but when I went back a few minutes ago, I couldn’t find any in the library. In any event, I hope you keep writing.
As far as I can remember the only Steve the Z story we ever hosted is "The Supergirl Phenomenon", which is still in the Library. There are a bit more on that style, I think mostly by some of our oldest contributors.
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Pepper wrote: Any more images from Lowerbase to tide us over?
Just posted two images to my DeviantArt account. Check them out!
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jnw550 wrote: Hey, Circe! Hope all is well. Just wanted to check in on you. How are things coming along?
Very slow. Real life has gotten in the way. But thanks for asking. Glad there is still interest out there.
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Oh, yes. I've noticed a few recent comments to some earlier chapters on deviantart, and the latest picture. Thanks for those. I find it interesting that the story started off as something of a lark. You've certainly set up a fascinating world and relationships; I thought you'd have had more of an endgame in mind.circes_cup wrote: Glad there is still interest out there.
You offered once to share access to the online drafts, is that still an option? I suspect that might slow you down even further; seems like addressing all the feedback is one of the things that's taking so long.
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