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StarTroopers

29 Mar 2018 21:28 #59018 by shadar
Replied by shadar on topic StarTroopers
I've just added Episode Four and Episode Five of StarTroopers to the library.

Things are starting to heat up as the ship and crew begin to come together.

Then the bugs attack. Roci goes to war .

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30 Mar 2018 06:58 #59022 by Gargamel
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Wow,I love this story. Although a little less ss-scenes for my taste, the writing is just too good to skip it. It seems like a mix of several excisting sci-fi-movies but with a better set-up than most. The character development (im only a bit disappointed with the josh-love-triangle since its not very plausible to me) is good paced and reasonable and the plot already has had some major twists. Its seldom that I read a story on this page and have clear images in my head. Really well told so far. Looking forward to many more chapters.
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30 Mar 2018 17:20 - 30 Mar 2018 17:23 #59026 by shadar
Replied by shadar on topic StarTroopers

Gargamel wrote: Wow,I love this story. Although a little less ss-scenes for my taste, the writing is just too good to skip it. It seems like a mix of several excisting sci-fi-movies but with a better set-up than most. The character development (im only a bit disappointed with the josh-love-triangle since its not very plausible to me) is good paced and reasonable and the plot already has had some major twists. Its seldom that I read a story on this page and have clear images in my head. Really well told so far. Looking forward to many more chapters.


Well, I can't write a story without some super-sex (which I assumed is what you mean by "ss-scenes"), but I try to keep it in balance. Of course, there is the expected wide divergence of opinion regarding how well I balance that.

Nor can I can write a story without redemption, which in this case is April, the ex-porn star and now superwoman that the rest of the crew call Dumb Bunny, the ship's metal-bender who has an unnatural devotion to the Captain, but who might just surprise everyone yet.

The mentioned love-triangle isn't what it seems, because John's heart is in only one place. Unfortunately, his betrayal of Ariel's secret isn't something she's going to get over easily. John's problem is that he doesn't want to hurt April, who is awakened for the first time in her life and feels good about herself. And despite his better angels, he's a sucker for sharing a cabin with a superwoman who thinks he's a prince among men, and wants to protect and care for him in all the ways. I haven't figured out how to write John out of his dilemna yet, or Ariel back in his life, but I'm working on it.

Given the embargo on posting new episodes until next week, I've got some time to slow down a bit and work on both the first big space battle, and also the personal challenges that exist inside the Roci.

Shadar
Last edit: 30 Mar 2018 17:23 by shadar.

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30 Mar 2018 17:43 #59027 by smoki07
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I did'nt any love-triangle. April is just obsessded by John and Ariel revenged on .him by putting April in his ways. Goods chapters. I can't wait for next.

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30 Mar 2018 18:10 #59028 by shadar
Replied by shadar on topic StarTroopers

smoki07 wrote: I did'nt any love-triangle. April is just obsessded by John and Ariel revenged on .him by putting April in his ways. Goods chapters. I can't wait for next.


That's basically how I intended it, Smoki07. The problem with Ariel's revenge is that April can get hurt, and John doesn't want that. April doesn't understand the bigger picture, or that John really wants Ariel in his heart (and his cabin) and April happily doing something else, but that's not going to be easy.

I'm also painting pretty close to some reverse sexual exploitation, with April tugging John's strings in ways that he can't resist. But this is a superwoman story, so I'm letting that run its course a bit, if for no other reason than the vicarious thrill of it all.

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30 Mar 2018 18:28 #59029 by shadar
Replied by shadar on topic StarTroopers

smoki07 wrote: I did'nt any love-triangle. April is just obsessded by John and Ariel revenged on .him by putting April in his ways. Goods chapters. I can't wait for next.


What I forgot to say is that it's "Ariel's revenge" because Ariel knows John is basically a good man with with high integrity, which is one of the reasons she loves him, but also that he's a total sucker for superwomen, their strength and power and the enhanced possibilities when it comes to intimacy. She knows he'll suffer, and that he'll screw up and suffer more.

But it's a dangerous game, as anyone knows who has suffered in a relationship that has gone on the rocks between two people who really should be together.

But my stories have both betrayal and redemption, so the end is not yet clear, even to me. My characters have come alive to the degree that they are telling their stories now, and I'm just writing them down. I don't know where they will take things.

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31 Mar 2018 14:25 #59035 by The Highlander
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And all the perorations were going so well until chapter 5! The story has certainly taken a brutal turn though I can see why you'd do it. However I'm a bit surprised when the attack happened there wasn't a larger evacuation or some scrambling of ultras to try and intercept the ships. Let's hope the crew of the Roci manage to inflict enough damage to make a difference.

As for Caitlan you're in luck, most people from Inverness don't have very pronounced accents (epically compared to someone from say Glasgow). As long as you make sure to use British terminology such as trousers instead of pants and chips instead of fries you should be fine. If you want I can PM you a list of some Scottish words and phrases you can throw in to make her sound more interesting.

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31 Mar 2018 17:57 #59036 by shadar
Replied by shadar on topic StarTroopers

The Highlander wrote: And all the perorations were going so well until chapter 5! The story has certainly taken a brutal turn though I can see why you'd do it. However I'm a bit surprised when the attack happened there wasn't a larger evacuation or some scrambling of ultras to try and intercept the ships. Let's hope the crew of the Roci manage to inflict enough damage to make a difference.

As for Caitlan you're in luck, most people from Inverness don't have very pronounced accents (epically compared to someone from say Glasgow). As long as you make sure to use British terminology such as trousers instead of pants and chips instead of fries you should be fine. If you want I can PM you a list of some Scottish words and phrases you can throw in to make her sound more interesting.



We don't know that there wasn't a last minute evacuation of Ubers from Groom, or even from some of the labs. We only know what Carmen THINKS happened based. She could be completely wrong and many or most Ubers survived. Maybe after Roci got out, the order was given for all Ubers to fly for their lives.

Maybe the Roci crew might meet up with a saucer from Earth down the road. Jacobs could have kept a duplicate of his plans for his operation stored elsewhere, and there are other engineers who could enlist more (or the surviving Ubers) in restarting the program. Maybe the Russians were already working on the same thing, but not near Moscow. Or the Chinese. jI'm leaving all that open and unplanned at the moment because it's not needed for the current plot, which is about the Roci and her crew THINKING they are Earth's only hope. And for a while at least, they will be.

Maybe Book 2, if there is one, will go back to Earth and show us the bigger story.

The Roci's plan of going deep to take out the soft, less-protected heart of the bug fleet while letting their warships attack Earth is a desperate strategy, but one that could work. Think of what happens when you attack the nest of some hornets or yellow-jacket bees. They go crazy defending the hive and completely forget about everything else. Maybe interstellar high-tech bugs have the same instincts. If so, they'll pull their ships back from Earth to protect against a ship full of humans who aren't behaving like humans. Clearly they knew about the Uber labs and so forth from their spies, so they will be horrified to have the Roci near their Queen Bugs or attacking their Brain Bugs, as well as their transports and non-combatant population..

As I see it, these bugs traveled here to colonize. It took them thousands of years and many generations to get here. (No FTL in my world.) They either conquer and harvest Earth, or they die. They can't go home. Their supplies are depleted from their long journey .There is no other planet in the Sol system they can live on. They will do anything to preserve the heart of their civilization and their ability to reproduce (the Queen Bugs). Roci is a dagger pointed at their very heart.


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01 Apr 2018 18:56 #59040 by The Highlander
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Good point, I forgot we were seeing everything from Carmen's perspective. Still looking to see how things develop.

I'll email you a list of some Scottish words for you to sprinkle into Caitlan's dialogue tomorrow. It'll be a nice little touch.
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05 Apr 2018 19:21 #59081 by shadar
Replied by shadar on topic StarTroopers
I will have two more episodes of StarTroopers ready to publish tomorrow (Friday), but am wondering if that's OK with the current contest still on and waiting to vote?

What's the ruling from the Moderators?

---
By the way, the next two episodes will complete Book 1, with the Roci having fought a fierce but successful battle at Mars and now on the way into the Asteroid Belt. They're hunting the bug Queens who will destroy all animal life on Earth if they get here to massively reproduce.

We are learning a few things about the bug civilization, with one of the most important that they have been traveling here for thousands of years since they destroyed their last fertile planet, and their population is greatly reduced. They survive by getting their Queens to a fertile new planet and then use the local animals to feed them so they reproduce, creating millions of new buglings. Which eat everything until the food runs out and they take to space again, traveling to murder another planet in another system.

Game over for humans if the Queens get here.

But the Roci and its crew of ten Ubers, now combat seasoned and mighty, will risk it all to find the bug Queens and destroy them first.

The bugs, of course, have a different plan, and they have a secret weapon coming in Book 2 that will turn the Roci's plans upside down.

Shadar

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05 Apr 2018 20:56 #59082 by fats
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delay your posting, woodclaw will be in touch.

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06 Apr 2018 09:04 #59084 by Woodclaw
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fats wrote: delay your posting, woodclaw will be in touch.

Fats


Since tomorrow I won't be online anyway those posts will be delayed. The rule of thumb is that stories won't be published for about 10 days after a workshop.

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06 Apr 2018 12:15 #59086 by shadar
Replied by shadar on topic StarTroopers

Woodclaw wrote:

fats wrote: delay your posting, woodclaw will be in touch.

Fats


Since tomorrow I won't be online anyway those posts will be delayed. The rule of thumb is that stories won't be published for about 10 days after a workshop.


I presume you mean for ten days after the due date for workshop story entries? Given this workshop extended entry date was 30Mar, then the library becomes available for member story posting again on 9Apr?

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06 Apr 2018 12:30 #59087 by fats
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10 days after the stories go live so that will be the 12th before any non-workshop posts go live.

I'm going to announce a change to story submission soon.

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06 Apr 2018 12:57 #59088 by Woodclaw
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fats wrote: 10 days after the stories go live so that will be the 12th before any non-workshop posts go live.

I'm going to announce a change to story submission soon.

Fats


This is it.

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06 Apr 2018 13:09 #59089 by shadar
Replied by shadar on topic StarTroopers
Thanks for clarification... in addition to the ending episodes of Book 1, I should have Book 2 well underway by that time.

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15 Apr 2018 10:05 #59151 by Woodclaw
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Episodes 6 and 7 are online.
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15 Apr 2018 20:42 #59156 by shadar
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Now that Book 1 is complete, I thought I'd give you a quick preview of my thinking for Book 2:


Book 2 will resume as they enter the Asteroid Belt and look for bugs on the larger asteroids/planetoids that make up the Belt.

Their challenge is that they presume most of the bug warships that were staged on the Moon for attacking Earth, preparing for a first harvest, are now racing outward (after they attacked the bugs on Mars), trying to intercept the Roci before they find and destroy their Queens.

The big problem is that John and the crew of the Roci don’t know where the Queens are (although they are pretty sure they killed one on Mars).

John argues that they’d logically be on the moons of Jupiter (remember, the bugs came from outside the system, so the Jupiter moons are easier to reach and safer for them than inner-system planets like Mars).

Carmen thinks they’ll be in the Belt, given that’s closer to Earth but still beyond the inner planets and supposedly safe from any attack Earth could mount in the year 2047.

Roci, of course, changes everything for the bugs. Until they kill it, they’re vulnerable. And vulnerable is the last thing they expected.

If the Roci spends too much time in the Belt, the warships will catch them before they can get to Jupiter, where defenses have probably be reduced given their perceived safety out there. But if the Roci bypasses the Belt, and the Queens are there, on Ceres or wherever, Earth will die.

These will be the challenges in Book 2, in addition to the obvious one of facing increasing combat against the bugs, who have proven to be very capable in a fight. The bugs don’t have the equivalent of Ubers, but they have very potent weapons that can easily destroy the Roci, and possibly capture the Ubers, as they very nearly did at Mars near the end of Book 1.

---

By the way, my next posting will likely be a single story about Kara and Kal's children, set in the last half of the 21st century. In my telling, Kara and Kal have married and now have ten children (7 girls, 3 boys), with Kara hoping to have yet another ten or so kids (despite the fact that she and Kal are well over 100 years old -- Kara still appears to be a young woman). They are determined to repopulate their race. Of course, that leads to even greater issues down the road than two first cousins marrying, given there are no other Kryptonians out there.

Even with artificial insemination, to avoid the social issues of second-generation mating, they are putting their hopes in the genetic engineering back on Krypton which supposedly rid them of any unhealthy gene sequences. Or so Kara remembers being told by her mother before flying to Earth. Questions remain, but this is their only hope..

The ever-growing El family lives on a very private and extremely large ranch in the mountains of Montana, thanks to the generosity of the Bruce Wayne Foundation, who granted them the 500,000 acre ranch.

The story focuses on the eldest of the El chldren, Alura, who is openly attending the University of Colorado, and is in a serious relationship with a guy, Alec Johansen, who is a graduate student at Colorado and is a former Olympic gold-medalist in swimming.

She's invited him home to meet her parents and nine siblings, which will prove to be quite the challenge for him. As adjusted as he has become to the peculiarities of dating a Kryptonian, he is not prepared for immersing himself in a wild and exuberant family of a dozen Kryptonians.

He was planning to ask Alura's parents for permission to marry, but now he learns that Alura is expected to contribute to this effort to repopulate Kryptonians. And now that the second born child, a boy, is in his mid-teens, that time is fast approaching.

How that might work within the context of their marriage, when she can never have his children, throws him for a loop. Sometimes love perseveres. Sometimes love asks too much. This story will try to explore those boundaries.

Shadar
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17 Apr 2018 20:01 #59175 by shadar
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It has been correctly pointed out that I have a bug in my bug story. Specifically, why are the bugs described as still working to bring meat to the Queen on Mars given the Roci's crew nuked her?

What I had intended to show was that the 15 "meat packing" transport ships that the Roci killed (14 at Mars and one enroute back to Mars filled with thousands of dead humans onboard) were intended to feed both the queen and her many offspring, effectively turning Mars into a "bug planet". The many bug warships on the Moon were there to support the arrival of the 14 other transports from Mars, once they had suppressed Earth's defenses sufficiently. At which point approximaely two-hundred-thousand or more humans were going to be "harvested" and taken to Mars as food.

The Roci screwed up all those plans without even understanding them. They got lucky. Not only did they kill the transports and the bug Queen on Mars, but given they are obviously racing outward toward Jupiter now, looking for more Queens, the bugs have had to recall most of their warships from Earth and Moon to chase after them.

Roci has a big head start, but they don't know where the other Queens are. They only know that they need vast amounts of food when they reproduce, so presumably, the other Queens are dormant at this time. Only the Queen on Mars was getting fed and preparing to reproduce.

The idea is that this is giving Earth a reprieve that they will hopefully use to create more facilities like Groom Lake and build many more saucers and crew them with many more Ubers. Roci job is to get the bug warships to chase them and stay alive long enough for this to occur. If they find and kill other Queens, so much the better.

Anyway, I left some fragments of an older idea in the text of Episode 7, suggesting that the Mars Queen was still alive and had to be fed. Oops.

Shadar
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19 Apr 2018 22:48 #59199 by smoki07
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I'd love to thank you for making a resume about latest and future epissode. It means a lot for readers like me that English isn't the native language. Plus, you post a (large) plot about your next story.

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19 Apr 2018 22:54 #59200 by shadar
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smoki07 wrote: I'd love to thank you for making a resume about latest and future epissode. It means a lot for readers like me that English isn't the native language. Plus, you post a (large) plot about your next story.


The next story, about the very large family of Kara Zor El and Kal El are the subject of the story I'm working on. There will be a twist called Maxima who turns out to be vital.

Anyway, it's a challenge to involve a family of Kryptonians, 12 children from 2 to 20 years, and the parents, into a story with the oldest daughter's boyfriend who is visiting for the first time. He's having some challenges given the dramatic towers the El family live in aren't designed to make it easy for flightless people to get around. Even the 2 year old can fly like a bird.

Shadar
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