Transformatrix 4000 -- Comments and Suggestions

I'd say that all four of the workshop stories fit into the established continuity.

Please do write that sequel. I'd love to read it!

And Ultragirl: Go for it. At the very least, it may inspire another writer to pick up where you leave off.

Okay, I updated. It's not the best, but there it is.

Okay, I updated. It's not the best, but there it is.

Mmm, crunchy :twisted: ! Plenty good enough . The only thing I'd tweak is that Tiff doesn't condone backtalk, so "Screw you" would have merited a good hard slap. (Also, the last line would have been a perfect place to introduce the use-name I'd planned for her, but of course you couldn't have known that because I hadn't told you.)

Fortunately for our heroines, Tiff simply doesn't care enough to actually kill them; she has other priorities. I have another post or two for her in the works, but they can take place in parallel to the main thread in which the heroines recuperate and discuss what to do about her. Spulo, if you were looking for something to motivate Kara to risk trying a Transformatrix on herself... .

--Y

Important note: the T5000 beta wasn't actually from GenreFan; it was from Janet Klyburn, who wanted to test one before she used one on herself. I'm sure by the time you read this she'll have made herself 5000-class too.

I don't have any plans for Regina, so feel free to exploit her exploits.

--Y

Thanks for bringing back Regina, Y!

To be honest, I have reservations about the new story-line. We might see chapter after chapter in which X uses the new, improved Transformatrix to make herself more powerful than Y, and Y uses it to become more powerful than X, and Z uses it to make herself more powerful than both of them together, with no end in sight.

But I enjoyed writing the "Plastics" into the Transformatrix Universe, and it might be fun to put Ms. Norbury into action. Conceptfan wanted the confrontation between Regina and Ms. Norbury to turn into a "school-destroying fight," so maybe he can get his wish!

Ms. Norbury, for those who don't know, is the math teacher from Mean Girls -- played by the fetching Tina Fey:

entimg.msn.com/i/150/Movies/Actors2/Fey_MT1245231_150x200.jpg

To be honest, I have reservations about the new story-line. We might see chapter after chapter in which X uses the new, improved Transformatrix to make herself more powerful than Y, and Y uses it to become more powerful than X, and Z uses it to make herself more powerful than both of them together, with no end in sight.

www.jargon.net/jargonfile/d/Dontdothatthen.html :-) . I don't mean that as dismissive; I certainly understand your concern. But I think the answer is simply that we're better writers than that. At least you all are; I hope I am too :-) .

For my part, I've been working from a pretty clear conception of where I think this story-line would naturally lead. I've been trying to *not* introduce too many of my background assumptions into canon, because I don't want to unduly constrain future authors, but if I've written y'all into a corner where it looks like the whole thing is untenable, I'd be happy to explain where I've been aiming. Or, if all else fails, we can boot my wrong turn into an alternate universe and try again.

--Y

Okay, I advanced the plot a bit, hopefully enough for someone else to post next. If I were more creative I would have thrown in a couple of red herrings, too; more leads to follow would mean more sub-threads for individual authors to lay claim to without having to worry about stepping on anyone else's toes.

Regina is sort of a red herring too: a non-essential side-plot. I didn't realize she was a movie character, but as I read her, she's naughty but not cruel, and more or less non-violent; unlike Tiff, she's not going to do anything that would make her Public Enemy #1, or even #10. Despite her power, her personality means that she'll remain a petty villain rather than a major one. At least that's what I was thinking when I decided to use her to test what I'm referring to as the T5000.

Perhaps starting another Interactive storyline thread?

If other people are like me, there's no telling what will strike their fancy and inspire them to put fingers to keyboard, so it would not be a bad plan to throw lots of Interactive starts at the wall and see which ones people take up.

--Y

I think I need to ask this explicitly, because I'm confused: what exactly is problematic about over-powered characters? The obvious problem is that they tend to steal *the story* from the protagonists, but I had that under control and just didn't do a good job of making that clear. My plan for Klyburn's succession of guinea pigs was that they would be a series of problems which couldn't be solved by brawn but could be solved by brain; and, when solved, those characters would be ushered more or less off stage (to Tales, perhaps) while the protagonists got on with the main thread of tracking Klyburn (and the other personal side-plots they have going). If that creates a problem I'm not seeing, we'll abandon it, but please show me the problem so I don't keep tripping over it.

Assuming we do want to go a different direction, the following new laws of physics will cover it:

1. Any application of a Transformatrix to an existing transformee has only a temporary effect. Sorry, Regina. (This also makes things more difficult for Klyburn herself, but she'll find a way around it eventually.)

2. There's only so much transforming a normal human can take. Tiff is the limit; anything more than that will kill the subject before the transformation can take hold. (Perhaps Klyburn accidentally vaporized several earlier test subjects before she scaled the T5000 down to where it still worked safely.)

I will admit to having a personal preference for leaving the universe open to characters of higher power levels; perhaps I'm just misreading how powerful the T4000s are, but to me it looks like they're not unlimited, even physically. But obviously that's a decision that should be made by the group, and I think at this point it would probably be a good idea to make it explicitly. Comments?

--Y

Well, since I'm the only one who's expressed a reservation about the new story-line, I guess I should answer that.

I don't have a problem with extra-powerful super-women per se. I love an uber-catfight as much as the next SWManiac, and this story-line has great potential in that respect!

My only concern was that the story might become stuck in a rut by introducing an endless succession of uber-transformees and uber-uber-transformees and uiber-uber-uber-transformees ad infinitum. But maybe you're right -- perhaps I'm not giving my fellow-writers enough credit.

Your two "ground rules" take care of my reservation, neatly and effectively. Let's make those "official" and move ahead with the story-so-far (which I've enjoyed very much).

Y: It looks as if you got my message. I assume my idea for a new chapter doesn't interfere with your long-range plans?

Well, since I'm the only one who's expressed a reservation about the new story-line, I guess I should answer that.

I don't have a problem with extra-powerful super-women per se. I love an uber-catfight as much as the next SWManiac, and this story-line has great potential in that respect!

My only concern was that the story might become stuck in a rut by introducing an endless succession of uber-transformees and uber-uber-transformees and uiber-uber-uber-transformees ad infinitum. But maybe you're right -- perhaps I'm not giving my fellow-writers enough credit.

Your two "ground rules" take care of my reservation, neatly and effectively. Let's make those "official" and move ahead with the story-so-far (which I've enjoyed very much).

Y: It looks as if you got my message. I assume my idea for a new chapter doesn't interfere with your long-range plans?

I had mentioned before that Denise would have to pay a price for her extra power. I really didn't want to reveal it just yet. She's headed to a "hospital" despite her healing, and we'll find out then. It may help with the rules for the crazy-powered girls.

Here are some thumbnail personality profiles for the quintet of super-women who are on Dr. Klyburn's trail (for the benefit of writers who want to tell them apart):

1. Lois Lane -- The consummate super-heroine (even more so than Kara) and the natural leader of the group. Picked up the ropes of super-heroing in the course of her long relationship with Superman (whose powers have vanished). Can juggle tanks and crush solid steel with the best of them, but also a level-headed strategist who looks at all sides of a situation. A tough, independent-minded investigative journalist. As "Ultrawoman," has taken Superman's place as the super-hero(ine) of Metropolis.

2. DeeAnn Donovan -- Feisty and fun-loving. Gets a charge out of being super and enjoys any opportunity to put her powers to the test. A bit of a show-off at times. A fitness model before her transformation, she is possibly the strongest of the transformess (at least until Denise's "power boost") -- although she's only 5'2" tall. Took the name "Superwoman" (and wore a costume to match) in the first story-arc, but now spends most of her time running her agency "Super Models Incorporated." Still, always ready to help her friends in an emergency -- especially if it promises a good scrap.

3. Kara Zor-El -- The original Supergirl. Less powerful than the transformees, but her experience as a super-heroine makes her a valuable member of the team. Has passed on the sobriquet "Supergirl" to Amber Slater. Still wears one of her old costumes and goes on patrol regularly, but now spends most of her time as a teacher/administrator at a newly founded academy for would-be super-heroines. Romantically involved with transformee Jill Henderson, though Jill's reluctance to bcome a costumed super-heroine has introduced some tension into their relationship.

4. Amber Slater -- At 17, the youngest of the group. Has taken the name "Supergirl," and is determined to live up to its legacy. A student at the super-heroine academy, but often goes into action as Supergirl (usually under Kara's watchful eye). Has performed some notable rescues and has been called "America's Super Sweetheart." Dedicated and altruistic, but still something of an innocent. Kara and Lois will be watching her back. Amber may prove to be hesitant when it comes to engaging in direct combat (unless her boy-friend Bobby Franklin is threatened ... )

5. Lana Lang -- A reporter for a Metropolis television station. Unlike Lois, somewhat impetuous -- inclined to tackle problems directly, without considering the larger picture. She's been fighting organized crime in Metropolis and generating some controvery by her methods. Civil libertarians accuse her of invasion of privacy (she uses her super-vision to follow suspected mobsters). She's inadvertently derailed a couple of undercover police operations. And since footage of her "citizen's arrests" wind up on her television station, her motives and her journalistic ethics have been questioned. But the citizens of Metropolis have taken the red-headed super-reporter to their hearts, follow her exploits avidly, and credit her with the drop in their city's crime rate. [This is all in a story I plan to post on the "Tales" thread.]

Anyway, that's how I see them.

I have an idea too that I'm hoping to post before the weekend...

Argonaut,

That is some great stuff with Regina!

Thanks, Sarge! Glad you liked it.

Regina's about as far as I'm ever likely to go in the "super bad girl" direction, but she was fun to write. And I guess every "genre" writer has to get off at least one "bullets and breasts" scene, so this was mine.

Not much ubergirl action in the chapter I just posted (unless you count reading a list at super-speed), but I'll try to make up for that in my next installment.

Okay, I lied. I didn't have much time for writing today, and my new chapter doesn't feature any ubergirl action either. But I hope to include a cheerleader-versus-football-team scene in the next installment!

Quick update to check in on Denise, Collin, and Lois. 8)

And then back to Regina.

CASTING:

Gretchen Wieners ... Lacey Chabert

lacey-chabert.us/gallery/displayimage.ph...=7456&fullsize=1

Regina George ... Rachel McAdams

www.rachelmcadams.org/gallery/displayima...12768&fullsize=1

Argonaut, definitely enjoying the Regina storyline. Great stuff, and I can't wait to read the upcoming installments.

Also, this line was money:

"So we're dealing with a self-centered, manipulative, super-powered queen bee with the ability to alter her appearance ... and she can control people's minds?"

Sounds like my kind of super girl!

Thanks, Berkhart!

Where have you been? We haven't heard from you in a while.

When will we see more of Ayami ... and Super Gail Kim? ( May I suggest "Gail Force" as a nom de guerre for Ms. Kim -- or has that been done?)

I'm planning one, maybe two, more installments of the Regina story. Then I'll let someone else pick it up. Maybe someone could find a way to tie it in to the main plot-line ...

Also, this line was money:

"So we're dealing with a self-centered, manipulative, super-powered queen bee with the ability to alter her appearance ... and she can control people's minds?"

Sounds like my kind of super girl!

This just occurred to me:

Ms. Norbury's description of Regina is quite appropriate, since "regina" is the Latin word for "queen."

I still stop in, but don't usually stay too long. Haven't really had much of a chance to sit down and write much lately either. Hopefully things will slow down in the next couple of months.

I like the "Gail Force" title...might have to steal it...

Anyway, keep the good stuff coming!