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Story blog
Please let me know what you think. I'll happily publish it here if resonses are good and once I have revised it to my satisfaction.
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- Dunnere1
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Right now I'm a bit too busy, but I think that it might be a worthy addition to our library.
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- Woodclaw
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I couldn't find any big errors, maybe some word corrections here and there nothing major.
I hope for a continuation as it really got me interested how it will go for them in the future.
This will be a great addition to the SWM library!
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- pansardum
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- deathgeonous
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www1969 wrote: Terrific story, and I'm looking forward to seeing it continue (and seeing it find a home here as well). Still, I know I'm in the minority, but I don't understand why a girl can't "just" be super. You created a really interesting scenario where someone can bring to life a character from a superhero video game, but almost immediately throw out the rules (because there's this "override", don't you see...) so she's not just strong enough to lift a battleship, she's strong enough to lift a billion battleships. And able to do absolutely every other impossible thing she wants to do too. I just don't see what's added to a story by adding a bunch of zeroes to the power multiplier.
Different strokes for different folks, it as simple as that.
I can only speak for myself but I happen to like the whole way over the top power level. Again only speaking for me this is a strong sexual fetish and quite frankly this shit gets me off, the more zeros the more I get off. It’s sexual fetish, it doesn't need to make sense. It doesn't have too much to do with a story. Think of it like an old fashion porno, people don't watch them for the story, now having said that if there is a decent story so much the better.
I do wish I were better at expressing myself with the written word but whatever, I’m not trying to troll you or derail the thread so...
Dunner1 so far I like you story a lot and I’ll definitely keep looking forward to reading it.
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- Grayface
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Grayface wrote: I do wish I were better at expressing myself with the written word but whatever, I’m not trying to troll you or derail the thread so...
No, dude, we're cool. I get it. I realize how ridiculous it sounds for me to want "realism" in a superheroine fantasy, it just happens to be the way I roll. The more over-the-top it is, the less I get off on it. But like you said, different strokes.
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- www1969
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Just kidding, I like it. It's quite a nice little thing you got there.
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- ChaozCloud
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As for power level, yeah, guilty as charged. There are also thematic reasons for doing so. I'm almost done with the next set of installments (look for them late next week). They will deal more directly with the theme of "with infinite power comes infinite responsibility...or not." In the third group of installments (which exist only in my brain right now), Mark and Sara will discover more about the makers of the CD and find that there were winners of the "Gold Edition" as well.
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Dunnere1 wrote: The next two installments are up. The story takes a turn for the strange and may not be to everyone's taste, but I hope the characters and humor make up for any adverse reactions people have to the story. Suffice it to say that Sara saves Mark's life by giving him a little bit of everything she has...
Personally, I like a superwoman who is secure enough in her power to not require all the men around her be puny weaklings. I mean, we have no respect for men who require the women around them to be their inferiors, I don't get why it's supposedly so awesome turn the tables.
Regardless, great story, keep it up!
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- deathgeonous
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looking forward to how this will turn out.
*Spoiler Below*
I think more description around the computer/car scenes wouldn't hurt, felt over too fast. It also felt like a pretty harsh reaction of her even after she knew she had saved him.
But the only real thing I could complain about is that I don't really like the blog setup, nearly missed a chapter since I had to scroll past one unread to find it.
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- pansardum
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Anyhow, the next two installments are up. This is all I have at present, so it may be a few weeks before the next installment.
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